Bride asks if it's okay to fire bridesmaids who can't afford her extravagant bachelorette party

When it comes to the wedding, every bride needs her squad—enter the bridesmaids, the unsung heroes who keep everything running smoothly behind the scenes. From managing last-minute jitters to ensuring the bridal makeup and clothes are picture-perfect, these trusted friends and family members play a vital role in helping the bride stay calm, organized and absolutely radiant. But one bride-to-be is considering "kicking off" two of her bridesmaids from her wedding party because they said they couldn’t afford the bachelorette party. The woman, u/auroraamourre, shared her frustration over her two closest friends in a post on Reddit’s "Bridezillas" forum.

The woman began her post by sharing the exciting news that her wedding is set for July 2025. Although she'd initially planned to have just four bridesmaids, she quickly adjusted the numbers after her fiancé requested eight groomsmen. To match him, the woman decided to bring on eight bridesmaids from her side. She asked two of her best friends to join, whom she referred to as "Friend A" and "Friend B." The bride-to-be also revealed that she and Friend B had been bridesmaids for Friend A and did everything they could to make her wedding day special.

"Anything that Friend A wanted, we both supported," she wrote. However, when the bride-to-be approached Friend A about the bachelorette, her friend immediately stated she wouldn't be able to attend, even before the bride had shared any details about the plan or expenses. "She admits she's not financially able to and that she hopes we have a great time! Okay, great. Don't be a bridezilla. It's all cool cause things happen. Then she tells me she can't afford the hairstylist I'm bringing, so she's gonna do it at home cause her mom is a stylist. Cool," she revealed. 

Even after adjusting to her bridesmaid's unexpected behavior, the bride-to-be kept her calm and hosted a bridal lunch to plan for the bachelorette. She was very reasonable in her planning and made an effort to keep the costs affordable. However, Friend A and Friend B missed the lunch without informing anyone. "I hear stories of brides asking girls to pay $1k for bachelorette trips. I really didn't believe in having a crazy bachelorette anyway. We aren't even going far outside our city. I just wanted to go on a wine tour and have a great time," the woman wrote.

After Friend A, even Friend B stepped down, saying she too would not be able to afford the bachelorette. "She still hasn't paid for makeup, which I've asked everyone to do so to spread out costs. Bridesmaid dress is $89. I already feel tremendously guilty about asking everyone to pay for dress, hair + makeup and a bachelorette trip. But, I've given my girls bridesmaids gifts and I plan on spoiling them on the trip with more gifts," the bride-to-be wrote. Moreover, she revealed that she did everything Friend A wanted during her wedding, even though it was very expensive for the now-bride-to-be. 

"My fiancé actually helped me pay for hair and makeup for Friend A's wedding. He made the hotel accommodations (he's a gentleman and would've done it regardless, but still). I've talked about it with my fiancé and he supports my decision, seeing how much it's been upsetting me." the woman shared. She concluded the Reddit post by revealing that she was expecting her first child with her partner. Hence, her emotions were all over the place. "It's to the point where I just want to cancel. I keep wondering, do the other girls feel this way? Are they dreading my own bachelorette? Maybe I need some outside perspective. Am I being a bridezilla for asking them to step down?" the bride-to-be concluded. 

Reacting to the Reddit post, several people shared their opinions about hosting bachelorette parties and spending too much money. For instance, u/cmgbliss wrote, "Instead of 'spoiling them' with gifts, why not just pay for hair and makeup? I miss the good old days when bridesmaids were just paying for their bridesmaids' dresses and the bachelorette party was just going to a bar." u/chaos1957 commented, "The problem began with a 16-person bridal party and just got worse. You can't expect other people to act like you or do what you did for them. You'll always be disappointed. Maybe you're a bit over-emotional, but if they really can't afford it, you have to let it go."