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Neurodiversity coach explains why people with ADHD often delay their bedtime

People with ADHD are more likely to delay their bedtime despite being sleepy and the reason behind it is intriguing.

Neurodiversity coach explains why people with ADHD often delay their bedtime
Representative Cover Image Source: Getty Images | Frederick Cirou

How often do we put off sleep, even when we’ve promised ourselves we’d stick to a bedtime? With phones or gadgets in hand, winding down can feel impossible. And for those with ADHD, falling asleep can feel even more like a daunting task. Mental health coach Kelly Banks—known as @divergentcoachkelly on TikTok—often shares tips for neurodivergent individuals and recently posted a helpful video addressing this very struggle.

Image Source: TikTok | @divergentcoachkelly
Image Source: TikTok | @divergentcoachkelly

"If you have ADHD, you might find yourself avoiding sleep. This is often due to what's called revenge bedtime procrastination," 40-year-old Banks said in her video. "Which is when you stay up late to reclaim the time for yourself because the day felt too chaotic or overwhelming or demanding." She explained that people with ADHD or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, feel pressured and struggle to deal with the daily routine and strive to have a sense of control over their life by pushing back their sleep schedule. "Delaying sleep is a way of pushing back against all the demands and tasks and taking back control of our time. So instead of winding down, we often stay engaged in activities that feel good at the moment even though we know we'll pay for it the next day because we've stayed up too late," Banks concluded.

Image Source: TikTok | @divergentcoachkelly
Image Source: TikTok | @divergentcoachkelly

Banks spoke to Newsweek about how this can affect an individual's daily life if it is not rectified. "Delaying sleep can significantly exacerbate common ADHD problems like impaired focus, increased impulsivity, emotional dysregulation and reduced ability to manage time effectively. A disrupted sleep schedule can also intensify brain fog and hyperactivity (both internal and external), making it harder to follow routines and complete daily tasks," she told the outlet. She additionally shared some tips for people to wind down before bedtime.

The first thing people need to do is set an alarm an hour before bed to remind them to step away from activities. Then, they can take hot and cold showers to relax their muscles and do some basic yoga stretches. Listening to audio visualizations that guide you through calming imagery before bed also helps. Doing a "brain dump" is also suggested where one writes down every thought and worry they have before bedtime. Playing with a fidget toy, changing the lighting in the bedroom, switching to salt lamps and reading a book is also encouraged. One can practice doing breathing exercises and try something Banks calls "moonlit mindfulness," where people can stand by an open window to gaze at the moon and the stars before sleeping.

Image Source: TikTok | @feebersjeepers
Image Source: TikTok | @feebersjeepers

The video reached 549k viewers on TikTok and garnered many thoughtful comments from people who experience trouble while trying to fall asleep. @hanbwill commented, "Night goes by so much slower and you don’t have to worry about other humans." @attentionseekeradhd mentioned, "Revenge bedtime procrastination gets me every time. It’s one of those things that awareness doesn’t help somehow." @love_my_beans added, "I also get understimulated to the point of a panic attack if I try to sleep without being completely exhausted." @gabymontgomery31 quipped, "Watching this at 4 am and contemplating hard if I should do my nails and just not go to bed."

You can follow Kelly Banks (@divergentcoachkelly) on TikTok for more videos on mental health.

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