Deciding to be a parent or not can be a difficult decision for anyone. This woman has some helpful advice to offer.
Many people are deciding not to have children these days. According to a study conducted by Pew Research Center, 44% of non-parents between the ages of 18 to 49 say it is less likely that they will have children someday, which is an increase of 7% from the 37% who said the same in a 2018 survey. While the decision to be child-free is personal, it often concerns others around us. For this reason, a woman who chose to be child-free took to TikTok and shared a video where she discussed this life decision.
In the video, Gvizzle stitched another TikTok user's video, where the original creator was asking child-free women over 40 about their life decision and if they regret the decision. In her own response video, Gvizzle says, "I have known my entire life [that] I wasn't going to have children. It was not [even] a decision I made, [it was] something I have always known."
Gvizzle also told BuzzFeed, "From the time I was a teenager to almost the present day, people have been giving me a hard time about being child-free. Once upon a time, I was told I'd regret it, and now, I'm occasionally asked if I do — I don't."
When asked why she chose to make this TikTok video, Gvizzle shared: "It’s frustrating that people think they know her better than she knows herself. That they presume to tell her how she'll feel or what she'll think. That they try to push their own desires/opinions/ideals on her without caring about what she wants. She knows who she is and what she wants."
She added, "I’ve had people say these same things to me for 30 years, and it’s annoying and exhausting. Seeing her, sitting in her car, presumably just having had one of those conversations, made me sad and upset, so I needed her to know that she was not alone and she was not wrong. When you’re the one sitting in the lunchroom at work being lectured at and questioned, it can be hard to remember that you’re not alone, that there are other people, happy, fulfilled people, who’ve made the same choice."
Her video resonated with many TikTok users. Her TikTok video is currently sitting with over 4 million views, with 24,000 comments. Gvizzle said: "I think it resonated with people who’ve been told some of those same things. I think young people are just starting to hear those things, so maybe they felt reassured by the video. Older women came out in the comments to back me up and reassure our younger sisters. Videos like mine also give voice to people who can't be as vocal or who aren't comfortable being vocal yet."
She concluded, "To people who don’t want children — there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not selfish, you’re not going to be alone, you’re not missing out because you don’t miss things you do not want, and it’s ok not to want children."
Moreover, it is an important conversation to start with and offer support to those who want to be child-free.