The incident turned it into a commentary on consent when people flipped the switch on how we perceive crime against different genders.
As women, it's constantly hammered into us that our safety is our responsibility. Going to school? Cover up, stay away from "bad" boys, always move in groups, and never talk to strangers. Stepping out to get groceries? Be alert and aware of your surroundings at all times, hold a key in your hand for self-defense, and send out an SOS to your emergency contacts if something, anything, feels fishy. Going out drinking with your friends? Don't accept drinks from strangers, DON'T EVER leave your drink unattended, grab a cab at the first sign of trouble, and don't wear "provocative" clothes if you don't want the wrong kind of attention. This business of having to be on high alert every second of the day is beyond exhausting and is the reality of pretty much every woman on the planet.
This is why when I came across a guy's sob story about being conned by a woman at a bar, I must admit, I felt a teeny tiny bit vidicated. And as it turned out, so did many other women on the internet. The tale, which was shared online by Twitter user @SydneyShyanneS a couple of years ago, turned it into a biting commentary on consent when netizens flipped the switch on how we perceive crime against women and crime against men.
this dude has been calling my bar to check the cameras because he asked a girl to put her number into his phone & she Venmo’d herself $2,000 😭 drunk bitches are GENIUS— shitney (@SydneyShyanneS) November 12, 2018
In her tweet, Sydney recounted how a man kept calling the bar she works at after getting scammed by a drunk woman at the establishment. "This dude has been calling my bar to check the cameras because he asked a girl to put her number into his phone [and] she Venmo'd herself $2,000. Drunk b**ches are GENIUS," she tweeted. The tweet quickly went viral on the social media platform and eventually reached the man who, as it turns out, got his money back.
Now that that’s settled, every dude that sent me hate mail can fuck off and stop bitchin— shitney (@SydneyShyanneS) December 2, 2018
The tweet also found its way to other social media platforms, including Facebook, where members of the Bitch Code group had a field day in the comments section. Commenters, most of whom were women, took the opportunity to show the incident through the same lens that people use to victim shame survivors of sexual abuse. Using the same language used to downplay a woman's sexual harassment/assault experience, netizens attempted to show what it's like to live as women in this society. "Sounds like a flimsy excuse to me. He sent her the money, regretted it, and now is just lying to try to get his money back," commented Facebook user Hannah Almeida.
"Her calendar clearly states that she was elsewhere that night. She drank beer, likes beer, drinks a lot of beer, and everyone at the club that night says these events did not take place. "He should have come forward sooner," wrote Sadi Spalding. "Look, I don't think I believe his story. Like 50% of theft reports are false. And tbh, being falsely accused of theft is WAY worse than being stolen from. Just my 2 cents," commented Sandy Hildebrandt, to which Nicole Whisenhunt added: "I worry that my daughter will be falsely accused of theft."
"Innocent until proven guilty. You know how many men these days make up false accusations of robbery against women? They have a vendetta. I think there should be higher penalties for men who claim false robbery," pointed out Denali Summer. "Look, there's two sides to every story. She deserves a fair trial - let's not ruin her life and promising career because he drunkenly made a bad financial decision. Smh boys, you need to be more careful," suggested Katharine Hawkins. "Are you just going to dangle your phone in front of someone's face like a delicious juicy steak and not expect a woman to take a bite???" asked Ashley Parker. You get the idea.
With over 24k likes and over 30k comments like these, the post demonstrates just how sick and tired women are of the rape culture rhetoric used to diminish our experiences. Here's hoping these comments will show at least a few victim-blamers how pathetic and heartless their justifications are.