Dad reveals the one factor that helps in understanding a child's perspective and building their confidence

Parenting as an experience is both fulfilling and complicated. It is a huge responsibility, as the ideals people inculcate in children in their younger days will impact them for the rest of their lives. If they are infused with confidence, they will function with that trait in adulthood. In order to help parents in this whole experience, Darius Ryan-Kadem, who goes by @dariusryankadem on Instagram, makes videos to teach them how they can approach daily situations in such a way that their children come out of it with positive learning. In his recent video, the father explained that the best way to give importance to children's perceptions so that they understand their mistakes rather than accept them due to fear is by asking questions.

The video begins with Darius' daughter, Freya, pouring an enormous amount of oats into a bowl. The oats were supposed to be a meal only for her and due to her pouring out such a large quantity from the packet, the duo would now have to collect it and put it back. Instead of just instructing the daughter to follow his lead, the father focuses on the daughter's 'perception' of the incident. He tried to understand the reasoning behind this action from the daughter's side. To make things easier for the followers, he showed two ways in which the whole situation could go down. One in which he forces his call and the other in which he clears all his daughter's doubts.

His first suggestion to parents, if they want to understand their child's perception, is to not overwhelm them. In this case, instead of making the daughter anxious, he puts forward a question in a calm manner that allows her to reach the right conclusion. He asked, "That's a bit too much. Isn't it?" This allowed her to figure out the mistake on her own volition. But this is not what exactly happened. She replied confidently, "No, it's not too much." This indicated to the father that there was much more going on in the daughter's mind than he had suspected. In this scenario, rather than instructing her, he allowed the girl to explain her line of thinking.

To do so, he probed her about the quantity that she put on the pan. He asked, "But that is a full pan, Freya. Are you going to eat all of that?" The daughter immediately answered, "Daddy eat some and Freya eat some." The daughter thought that she was pouring the oats for both of them and therefore put in such a large quantity. It was not with the intention to waste but to share. Thereafter, the father explained to her where she went wrong. He explained to her that she had poured more than half of the whole packet into the bowl. That would be way more than what she and her father combined could eat.

In the end, the duo cleaned up the mess together. This method of questioning allowed the daughter to figure out the situation herself and develop an understanding. Moreover, she felt prioritized, with her perspective being given importance. This will make her more confident in communicating her thoughts in the future.

The comments section loved this technique. @inmovementdance shared their opinion about the method and wrote, "I’ve learned that some children develop a fear of being controlled or shamed by parenting that is more demanding or reprimanding, so this method of asking questions is a great way to allow them to make the right decisions and appreciate the outcome without feeling forced or shamed." @neveranickname wanted this technique to go beyond parenting, "If only the education system would acknowledge this beautiful functional way of helping kids learn!"