Woman says people need to get used to this one crucial thing in friendships, sparking debate

How often do we hesitate to seek help from friends, family and acquaintances? No matter how much a person is struggling in their life, they still think a few times before seeking small favors. People are afraid that they might end up becoming an inconvenience to them. Amelia–who goes by @ameliamontooth on TikTok–discussed the issue of being an inconvenience to your friend or family through her video and explained why she thinks it should be normalized without hesitation.

"I think it's okay to ask your friends to ride to the airport, even LAX, at rush hours and actually, it's more than okay," she began her video. "It's radical because there's this thing called the small favors economy and the idea is essential. The people in the past used to rely on their community, their network and their neighbors for small favors." She continued that in earlier days, people asked for a ride to the airport, for a cup of sugar or things like borrowing a dress for an event. But in the "late stage of capitalism," asking for a favor from your community or network feels like something that we shouldn't do.

Amelia further mentioned that people were not expected to do everything on their own instead of seeking the help of a friend. Whatever we needed, we got access to almost anything by tapping a button on our phones. "That's actually really bad," Amelia explained. "Because it drives us further into isolation from each other and our friends, which is good for literally no one except for the people who are trying to sell us stuff on our phones. Honestly, I think we all need to get a little bit more comfortable with the idea of inconvenience. It's really not that bad and, in this case, can be really good. Like, if you ask your friend for a favor, they'll ask you for a favor and it's a great cycle, a great way to deepen that friendship and stop our loneliness epidemic."

"Like I'm out here, offering airport rides and to be clear, if you're gonna ask for small favors, you gotta offer small favors," Amelia concluded. In an interview with Buzzfeed, Amelia said, "There are so many factors at play here, but I do think technology is a main driver." "When you have Uber and InstaCart at your fingertips, it seems like asking for a favor from a friend or family member is more of an inconvenience because now, you can do it easily yourself. And America, especially white American culture, already had such a 'bootstrap' and 'do it yourself' mentality that these apps and services latch onto." 

The commentators on her TikTok page revealed their personal experiences of being an inconvenience to their friends and family. @nicoleariii wrote, "I absolutely love helping my friends out when they need it, but when a friend asks for rides and favors multiple times a week and it is all give and no get, then I feel like it's really inconsiderate." @lilcherryma joked, "I can't wait to see more Gen Z become parents and their takes on postpartum isolation. So many millennial moms want to isolate themselves for 6 months from friends and then can't figure out why they're depressed and have poor relationships." @abbyrayi1 added, "I will say, airport pickups are my least favorite, but I did it this week. But sometimes, I may say no. But I will do inconvenient things for friends and even acquaintances because of community."

You can follow Amelia (@ameliamontooth) on TikTok for more videos on culture, news and lifestyle.