Woman caught bf using Tinder but he claimed he was trying to deactivate it — his excuse for searching 17 women on Facebook made things worse
'I don't see you clicking on a picture of Richard and David and Henry and Jerry,' Judge Star said incredulously.
Being on a dating app while in a relationship is a serious red flag. Miss Hawk brought her fiancé, Mr Crabtree, to Judge Starlet Marie "Star" Jones' court after she found the Tinder on his phone. He said it was on his phone so he could log in and deactivate it. She did not believe it and did some further digging. She discovered his Facebook search history, but his explanation in front of Judge Star made it ten times worse. The story was shared on Divorce Court (@divorcecourt) on October 21. It had over 34,500 views, 755 likes, and 13 comments.
17 women
Hawk believed her fiancé's Tinder account "was already supposed to be deactivated." But when she opened his Facebook account, "there's a whole list of girls that he's just looked up – the s------- -looking girls you've ever seen." The court presented a screenshot of Crabtree's search history for everyone to see. Hawk then explained, "Those were girls that were requesting to be his friend, and he was just seeing if he knew them."
Judge Star read out the girls' names. There were 17 of them. Crabtree jumped in to defend himself, "They've requested me. I don't even know these women," but Judge Star pointed out, "But you looked them up." He retorted, "I clicked on the picture to see if I knew them. Because if I know them from anywhere, I might accept a friend request." Judge Star shut that down when she said, "I don't see you clicking on a picture of Richard and David and Henry and Jerry." Crabtree replied that he simply didn’t receive friend requests from men.
Wedding plans fall apart
Hawk's doubts were not limited to Tinder and Facebook. She told the court that after three years of being engaged, Crabtree still had not set a wedding date. She had already picked out a wedding dress, and he had promised to put down a $250 deposit within seven days. But the store later called to tell her he had never shown up. Hawk said Crabtree initially told her that his brother needed the money to repair his truck. When she looked into it, however, she discovered that he had used the money for online betting.
Crabtree later admitted that he had lied about having enough money and said he had hoped to increase what he had through betting. When he told Judge Star that relationships among people their age rarely worked out, she questioned why he had proposed in the first place. "Because I want it to work," Crabtree replied. Judge Star told him, "The only way it works is when you start working on it. It doesn't work when you don't work on it."
Polygraph test
Crabtree voluntarily agreed to a polygraph exam. Jon Yarbrough, a certified polygraph examiner, came to share Crabtree's answers. Crabtree was asked if he had any sexual relations with any of the girls on his search list. His answer was, "No." "That day you returned home at midnight in different clothes. Did you have sexual contact with anyone?" Judge Star asked. Crabtree's answer again was "no." All of his answers when asked if he had any sexual relations with someone other than Hawk were "no," and Yarbrough attested to that. After hearing the results, Judge Star told Hawk, "Mr. Crabtree is not a cheater." But she made it clear that the test did not resolve the couple's other problems, particularly Crabtree's reluctance to commit to a wedding date.
One question remained
Judge Star told Hawk that Crabtree was unlikely to set a date until he truly wanted to and asked her to say what she needed from the relationship. Hawk asked her fiancé directly for a wedding date, but at first, he still could not give her one. After more prompting, Crabtree finally named March 16 and proposed to Hawk again in the courtroom. Hawk accepted, but the doubts had not completely disappeared. She said she was glad to know he had not been cheating, though she still wasn't convinced that he was serious enough about getting married.
Facebook sleuth
Dating-app use and phone privacy are common flashpoints in relationships. Unfortunately, not everyone respects them. An October 2023 Spokeo survey among 1,158 Americans through Amazon’s survey platform found that 34.4% of people agreed that joining a dating app while dating someone is unacceptable. However, 18.7% confessed that they've done it. Those concerns closely echoed the trust issues Hawk brought before the court. The survey also found that 23.7% had gone through their partner's phones and messages. Hawk said checking Crabtree’s phone was what led her to discover both Tinder and his Facebook search history.
'Romper room'
Several viewers said they had heard similar explanations before. @janegottmer wrote, "That's what my ex said too. If you look at the picture, you don't get that name in your search bar." @amlhazar pointed out, "Stifani after Tiffani."
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