Woman asks if she was wrong to not serve dinner when in-laws visited unannounced, sparks debate

Everyone treats their guests differently. Some meticulously prepare for guests, while others prioritize quality time over elaborate hosting. Guests, too, have a responsibility to be considerate by not arriving unannounced and expecting full preparation. However, one woman grappled with guilt for not preparing dinner when her in-laws made an uninvited visit. She took to social media to question whether her lack of dinner preparation was wrong.

u/Kitranado, a 31-year-old woman shared about in-law's visit to her house. She said they called her in the morning and asked if they could visit her sometime on that day. "My husband is away for 2 months for work, and my parents and sister live across the country, so my in-laws have been trying to spend a lot of time with me, I think. I’ve noticed my MIL calls me to chat and invites me out or comes over much more than usual now. A few times a month now. It’s appreciated," she expressed.

She told them she would like to see them and invited them at 3 pm. She mentioned her in-laws' fondness for seeing their dog and relaxing on the patio. However, they ended up staying till 8 pm. "I put out drinks a few times, and some crackers and cheese around 5. I didn’t have any supper prepared for a group (I just didn’t expect them to stay so long. I didn’t mind but I had no food ready, I need a grocery trip. I only had snacks and microwave dinners)," the person wrote.

Around 6 pm, her in-laws checked if she would like to go to the local diner for supper. They didn't get the cue and the woman didn't want to spend money on a meal so she declined and offered to put more chips out. She noted that, despite appearing irritated, her in-laws stayed until about 8 pm before leaving. Later, on her nightly call with her husband, he said that they complained to him "harshly." They said that she hosted them and didn't feed them and also that she refused to go out for supper. "I didn't think it was a big deal. My husband said 'You probably should have just gone for supper if you didn't have anything at home,'" the person wrote.

The post garnered 702 upvotes and is captioned, "AITA for not offering a meal while my in-laws visited?" People on social media backed the woman for her decision. u/thatsointeresting commented, "NTA. They really should have taken the hint and left when mealtime came and there was no dinner plan. They have no right to ask to visit, stay for 5 hours, and then complain about you. That said, the most polite thing to do in that situation was to acquire food. Either put together a meal with whatever snacks and staples were on hand, order takeout or go out to eat."

u/lorrainemom wrote, "They invited themselves. In that case, the meal should’ve been on them, they should’ve ordered and paid for takeout. That's ridiculous that they invite themselves over and then expect her to cook for them or take them out to eat. NTA and your in-laws are entitled to." u/yasposta shared, "Or when they asked if she wanted to go out say 'No, thanks, but you all go ahead. Have a great time. Bye.' Putting out more snacks made it awkward for them to leave." u/ScaryButterscotch474 said, "ESH 'Oh I would love to go to the diner but I am feeling tired. I might just have an early night. You two go. Enjoy yourselves while I take a shower and have an early bedtime. I will see you out.' Gets them out of the door in a nice way. You did not handle this well and they overstayed their welcome."