Woman asks if she was wrong for calling out boyfriend over his sexist comment on women's weight

Managing a healthy weight is crucial for every individual. However, some people have double standards when it comes to dating heavier women while being overweight themselves. A woman who goes by u/Appropriate-Pea-156 on Reddit shared how she unwittingly called out her obese boyfriend for making a rude remark about the weight of women he found on Tinder. The woman asked the online community to share their thoughts on whether or not she did the right thing by doing so in front of his friends.

The woman wrote that she is 5ft 6in and weighs 120 lbs, whereas her boyfriend is 6ft and weighs 229 lbs. From a medical standpoint, her boyfriend was obese. It wasn't a problem for the woman because when she met him and they got together, he was already overweight. Despite sharing his desire to lose weight, he never really went out to exercise or followed a strict diet. "I try to be supportive and offer him advice or general encouragement whenever he discusses his desire to lose weight," the woman wrote in her post.

"An occasional point of contention between us is that he tends to offer me diet advice. It's annoying because nutrition and fitness are big passions of mine. I'm not an expert by any means, but I've done several courses and I feel I know more than the average person. Plus, I feel that I can demonstrably show that I can manage my weight, so I don't like that he constantly feels the need to give me advice," the post continued. Eventually, during a meet-up with their friends, the pair saw themselves in an awkward position.

During the gathering, some of the guys started sharing their personal experiences with online dating. The woman's boyfriend said how he had used Tinder before meeting his girlfriend but decided to delete it because there were "too many desperate fat chicks." "He said this in such a disgusted and dismissive way that I genuinely saw red for a second and just blurted out 'seriously? You're going to criticize fat chicks?'" the woman mentioned in her post. Her reaction was followed by a long and awkward pause, but thankfully, one of their friends decided to move the conversation forward by cracking some jokes.

"My boyfriend didn't speak to me for the rest of the evening. He texted me the next day to say that it was incredibly rude and disrespectful to comment on his weight, especially in front of his friends. He says he thinks he wants a few days away from me to decide whether or not he can forgive me. I agree it was rude of me to call him out in front of his friends, but I also think what he said was obnoxious and borderline sexist. I've apologized to him, but I'm not sure if I'm genuinely in the wrong here," the post concluded. Later, in an edit, she revealed that they have broken up for good.

The Reddit community promptly criticized the double standards of the woman's ex-boyfriend and left comments in her support. u/pink_gem quipped, "What he said was obnoxious and borderline sexist. And I'm pretty sure I've said the same thing to guys I know who have said similar things. But also, you should just tell him to stop giving you advice if it annoys you. The way you framed this doesn't make it clear if you have communicated that to him, but you should. He can't read your mind. He might not even be aware he's really doing it."

u/fiveAtefive4life added, "While apologizing was the right thing to do, this guy gaslights you severely at every turn. It sounds like pure chaos. It might be best to move along at this point. Let him have his pathologies about weight and find someone else who isn't healthy to share them with. He sounds like a bully and an a**hole and while I'm sure he has some good qualities, you haven't described any here. Even his incredibly wounded response to your understandable frustration is him playing the ultimate victim."