Wife considers divorce after husband says hurtful things about their autistic child, asks if she's wrong

Most of us at some point in our lives must have received advice, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” But not everyone can sail through the crisis. For some, sooner or later, it becomes a cakewalk, yet for others, it gets difficult to cope with. In a similar way, a man was overwhelmed after his five-year-old son was diagnosed with autism. His wife, u/Accurate-Fee9591, overheard him complaining about the same to his friends. In a now-deleted post, the 30-year-old mother expressed her dilemma of getting a divorce after she was left “absolutely crushed” by her husband’s insensitive comments.

“I have been married to my husband (32-year-old) for five years. We've had our share of problems like any couple, but this one’s really shaken me to my core,” the wife wrote. Notably, the couple remained strong together amid the tough times since their child’s autism diagnosis two years ago. Having to raise a neurodivergent child does not stop the mom from loving him. In fact, she stopped thinking of the challenges that come with the developmental disorder. Additionally, she can't picture her life without her adorable “little boy.”

But her husband lacked the same feeling and started acting differently over the past few months as she noticed. Initially, she thought the distance arising in their relationship was due to her husband’s work stress. However, as time passed, she overheard him complaining about the parental challenges to his friends. “He started saying how our son is 'too much to handle' and that he feels like 'he’s a burden,’” the post read. Furthermore, the emotionally charged-up husband admitted that he sometimes wished for his son’s adoption.

“At first, I thought maybe he was just frustrated and saying things out of anger or stress, but he kept going,” the woman added. She could not believe the words coming out of her husband’s mouth. On the contrary, her husband confessed in front of his pals about missing the “freedom” he had before becoming a parent. At this point, the wife felt their relationship was growing apart, and the only option she had was to face reality.

“When I confronted him, he brushed it off, saying I was overreacting and that he didn’t really mean it, that he was just blowing off steam with his friends. But how can I not take that seriously?” the woman raised a pertinent question. Following this, she went on to complain about no apology coming from her partner’s side. “He’s literally talking about abandoning our son! He didn’t even feel sorry about it,”

“He said he’s just overwhelmed and feels like our son’s autism is taking over our lives and that he doesn't know how much more he can take. But instead of working through it together, he's talking about running away from the problem,” she concluded. Her post invited widespread reactions on Reddit. “Children can indeed feel like a burden at times, regardless of their abilities. Some may demand significantly more attention and sacrifice than others,” u/DaZMan44 commented. “Caregiver burnout is a real thing. Take advantage of babysitters and respite care. Remember you are more than just a pair of parents and act that way,” u/PeachyFairyDragon suggested.