Being vegetarian is a choice that people around that person need to respect even when they don't completely understand the reason behind it.
While weddings are a huge deal for the people having them or those who are a part of the wedding party, that isn't the case for people merely attending them. For people attending the wedding, the only two things they're concerned about are the food and the venue. Especially the food. But what happens when it's your best friend's wedding and you aren't okay with the meal menu? Well, here's what u/Ok-Perspective-1111 did while also sharing her story on Reddit.
She started her story by saying how she'd been best friends with a girl, whom she calls Abby for the sake of the story, for years. The two girls had spoken about Abby's dream wedding and promised to plan it together ever since they were teenagers. That is why, when Abby got engaged and asked the writer to help her plan it, she was thrilled for her. Talking about the one disagreement she and Abby had concerning the wedding, she said, "Through the process, the one thing that we disagreed on when planning the reception was the meal plan. We went over the menu options together, but I expressed concerns about the limited choices for my dietary preferences." The reason behind this was the fact that she was vegetarian and she suggested to Abby that she have at least one vegetarian dish at the wedding.
While Abby seemed to understand, she ultimately chose the food well-suited for most of her guests. She said that the cost wasn't worth the trouble for a dish that most people wouldn't even like. The writer said, "I didn't try to argue because ultimately it was her wedding, but I made a joke saying that I would bring my own Tupperware of food and she said she would kill me if I did." Now came the day of the wedding, for which the friend decided to get her own prepared meal since she wasn't satisfied with the catering options. There was one salad, which she ate to not seem rude during the reception and she went to the kitchen to eat her food in solitude so that no one could see her. After that, she immediately got back out, just in time for the toast, before eating some cake further into the night. However, it so happened that while she was eating discreetly in the kitchen, Abby's aunt, uncle and cousin saw her. Not only that, but they went ahead to gossip about it with the other guests.
However, Abby happened to overhear it and was very hurt and upset. The original poster said, "During the reception, she broke down in tears, feeling insulted and embarrassed by my actions." She further added, "I apologized and told her that it was not my intention to embarrass her but that I've been vegetarian for most of our friendship and that while I was happy for her and her big day, I wasn't going to eat something that I did not enjoy or want." In a moment of upset, she also commented on how she should have eaten at home. However, that comment resulted in upsetting Abby even more.
The woman felt like her attempt to express her needs ended up causing a rift between the two friends, leaving them both hurt and sad. She asked the internet if she was wrong and the internet roared that she wasn't. u/Ok-Rice-7589 dropped some truth bombs and said, "NTA. That isn’t a friend and I don’t care what wedding etiquette there is, if you can’t provide one meal for the person you call your best friend and conveniently used to plan your wedding, then you’re much worse than an AH, that’s just completely selfish and self-absorbed and she deserves to be gossiped about." u/jippyzippylippy said, "NTA. She knew you were a vegetarian, made no allowances for it and you ate the food out of sight in the kitchen. Your friend is a huge drama queen/control freak." u/Loud_Low_9846 shared a personal story and said, "I got married almost 30 years ago and some of my guests were vegetarian. They got vegetarian meals and I don't mean just a side salad. The restaurant catered for them, so no reason why OP's friend didn't, other than she couldn't be bothered to."