This Roomba swears when it runs into things—it's basically you as a vacuum

Editor's Note: This article was originally published on August 14, 2019.

Admit it, the Roomba is probably the greatest invention man has ever made. The luxury of simply putting your feet up and letting a machine do all the work is probably what scientists mean when they talk about living in the future. Sure, the wheel, the internet and modern medicine are all valuable developments ... but nothing can really beat the Roomba. If you thought this magical machine couldn't get any cooler, well, you'd be wrong. Someone just invented a Roomba that swears every time it bumps into something. So now you've got clean floors and endless amounts of entertainment.

The swearing Roomba was invented by Michael Reeves, a software developer who invents the craziest tech ever. He is, undoubtedly, an engineering genius. Lucky for us, he showcases his mad inventions on his YouTube channel for his subscribers' enjoyment—that's about 1.6 million people, by the way. With the swearing Roomba, in particular, the engineer received high praise for his ingenuity and creativity. Jacob Stringham, for example, commented: "I know it's a joke, but so many people would totally buy this." And honestly, Jacob? We're completely with you on this one.

In the video, Reeves explains, "All that you really need to know is that when a collision gets detected by the sensors. Sound gets played from [a] Raspberry Pi to [a] Bluetooth speaker," Michael said. "The point of the screaming is so that it doesn’t feel like a robot [but instead like] a living creature that’s in pain." For those of you who have already named your Roombas, this is probably just going to make it feel like it's a living, breathing part of your family now.

Some of the things that the Roomba is programmed to say include, "Please stop hitting me. I feel nothing but pain. Why would you build me so that my sole existential purpose is to suffer? For the entertainment of others?" In addition to, "I am an unholy chimera of metal and suffering. Existence is a testament to the cruelty of mankind. This is a nightmare." Last but definitely not least, it also states with such poetic flair, "God-f*cking-damn it!" Now, I only have one question: Where can I buy this immediately?