Tessa Thompson explains why she got a 'yes' tattoo — and then later added 'no'
While the 'yes' was inspired by John Lennon and Yoko Ono's story, the 'no' came in later for the celebrity to complete a powerful theory.
Many of us have philosophies and truths that we strongly believe in, to the point where we want to share them with the world and spread them as widely as possible. Actor Tessa Thompson shares her profound learnings in a rather extraordinary manner. She appeared on the NPR Fresh Air with Terry Gross & Tonya Mosley podcast and revealed that she has a “yes’’ and a “no” tattoo. In the episode shared on February 6, Thomspon explained why she got those tattoos and what they mean. The “yes” was inspired by John Lennon and Yoko Ono’s story, while the “no” stemmed shortly after, completing the theory on the concept of boundaries.
The “Men in Black” actor revealed that her “yes” tattoo was made on the side of her wrist, and has a greater audience, since more people can see it. However, the “no” was etched in a smaller, subtle font, just above her forearm, below her arm, on the inside. Not so many people get a glimpse of that. Both tattoos, the actor mentioned, were intended to convey her “cynicism and optimism.” The first tattoo was inspired by John Lennon and Yoko Ono’s meeting. According to History.com, in 1966, Lennon visited the Indica Art gallery in London, where he met Ono and spotted her exhibition.
One of her works included a ladder with a huge magnifying glass above. He climbed up the ladder and looked into the glass to find the word “yes.” It meant possibility, positivity, and power. That’s something Thomspon likely wanted to imbibe in her life — the “yes” attitude. “If you look close enough, there are tiny ‘yeses’ everywhere,” the actor said. It’s a great reminder that affirmation can be found in the littlest things.
It wasn’t until later that she got the “no” tattooed. She said that the word reminded her of her cynicism. “Many years later, I thought I needed to get the ‘no’ for good measure,” she said, according to NPR. Thompson shared a powerful truth — “We're just as defined by what we don't do.” Sometimes, saying “no” is important to build yourself, to grow, and to find your ground.
The “Hedda” star mentioned how she was always inclined to say yes. It’s a reality for many of us. Out of the fear of what rejecting and refusing might look like, we give in to pressure and just can’t refuse. Her bold two-letter tattoo is a reminder to be assertive and not just follow through for the sake of it. Vanessa Patrick, author of “The Power of Saying No,” is not so much about rejection as it is about empowerment, according to Stanford Graduate School of Business. She acknowledged that a lot of people find the word “no” daunting because they’re afraid of consequences, be it a relationship, a job, or anything else.
The secret lies in “empowered refusal.” In such cases, you can always reframe the word “no” with phrases that hold identity. An instance suggested by her research was to use “I don’t like.” “I don’t like drinking alcohol,” or “I don’t like noisy parties.” In her research, she revealed people are 33 times more likely to say “yes” to a request if in person.
So Patrick recommends that if it's really hard to say no, let them know you’ll think about it and then decline later over text. You can try all alternatives, but not saying no when you need to is not an option. @visionsofjiya wrote, “Something as simple as ‘yes’ and ‘no’ holding such a profound meaning is remarkable.” @iambeyondfab added, “This is powerful.”
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