Dad found daughter bullying a classmate so he took them both shopping, and only paid for the victim
'Growing up, I was bullied, so I first understood how Ryan felt.'
When Randy Smalls found out his teenage daughter had joined in mocking a classmate at Berkeley Middle School, he knew he couldn’t let it slide. According to Live 5 WCSC, the victim, Ryan Reese, had been targeted over her clothes and was already coping with the loss of her father, grandfather, and aunt. Her stress had been so heavy that it was triggering non-epileptic seizures. When she told her mom about what was happening, she revealed that one of the girls laughing along was her cousin. That’s how the families got on the phone, and Smalls stepped in.
He understood immediately what Reese was going through. "Growing up, I was bullied, so I first understood how Ryan felt," Smalls said. Having carried that pain himself, he wanted to make sure both girls walked away with a lesson. He gave the money he had set aside for his daughter’s shopping trip to Reese, and also brought his daughter along to help pick out new clothes for her cousin. Smalls told WCSC, "I think that's the perfect punishment because my daughter likes to dress. So if they're picking on a student because of the dressing, then I take away from her and give it to somebody else."
Reese not only got new clothes but also a fresh hairstyle and regular salon appointments, with Smalls promising to cover twice a month until the end of the year. Local salons soon offered to donate services so she would be styled for months ahead. Smalls’ daughter, who loved fashion, was upset by the punishment — and that was the point. For Reese, the kindness reached far deeper than the shopping spree. "He’s the first father figure I’ve had since my dad died," she said, "Now I have someone I can look up to."
Smalls shared the story on Facebook (now-deleted), where thousands of people praised his decision and offered support for Reese. The attention eventually brought Smalls and Reese onto Steve on Watch with Steve Harvey, where they talked about the punishment, the new bond it created, and the bigger lesson behind it. "I believe as parents, we have to take responsibility for what our children do," Smalls told Harvey, "We can guide them, but it starts with us." He also said he had been putting together a formal father-daughter event during Valentine's week for three years. "I want the fathers to show their daughters how the date is supposed to go. You don't want the daughters to go out with someone who doesn't know how they are supposed to treat her," he said. He also invited Reese to the event that year.
Research shows why these interventions matter. According to StopBullying.gov, bystanders who step in can "make a huge difference," while silence or laughter only reinforces the cruelty. Meanwhile, a 2013 study in the Universal Journal of Educational Research found that bullies thrive on having an audience and that bystanders feel safer watching than speaking up — but "watching without intervening actually reinforces bullying." Smalls doesn’t want his daughter or anyone else to fall into that pattern. He’s since launched a group called "Parents Against Bullying," working alongside Berkeley County Beats Bullying and C.A.V.E. (Communities Against Violence Everywhere) to involve parents, teachers, and neighbors in real solutions.
More on Scoop Upworthy
When single mom found out her son bullied a classmate, she stepped in with some old-school parenting
Deaf teen's friends rally around him after school bullies throw his bag in the toilet
Share on Facebook
