10 'green flags' in men that women find the most desirable for an ideal relationship

Green flags in men

Human relationships have many facets to them. Especially in relationships, the complexity tends to increase as individuals become more picky about what they want in their ideal partner. From a woman's perspective, there are many undesirable qualities that they do not want to see in a man. However, at the same, there are certain things that women specifically like to see in men. Reddit user u/AlbatrossPretend7320 inquired about what constituted "green flags" in guys for the women on the platform. Here are 10 of the best insights that they had to share:

1. Being kind to animals 

When I met my now-husband one of the first things I noticed was how kind he was to animals. He was fostering a dog and would go on special dates with her, etc. If being mean to animals is a red flag, then being good to them is the exact opposite. u/Psychobabble0. During one of our first dates, my now husband pulled over and moved a turtle across the road. Sealed the deal for me. u/hk630

2. Having a hobby for pleasure 

Having a non-monetized hobby that takes up a reasonable amount of their time. u/Son_Of_Toucan_Sam. I like the distinction with this one since I paint as a hobby. People are always asking me why I don’t sell my paintings. The simple answer I give them is I’m not at that level yet but the truth is it helps me to ease some stress from my actual job and I’d rather not have to report more income on my taxes. Not every hobby needs to be monetized to be good. Something as simple as mowing grass or throwing cards into a hat can be a hobby. u/TheMonocleRogue

3. Disagreeing amicably 

Disagreeing with you, respectfully and honestly, then move on. A man who accepts that two people can look at the same evidence and reach different conclusions, and doesn't have to try to convince me of his viewpoint? Yes, please. u/justatrashypanda. This is awesome. If only we could find common ground on a lot of things just generally as humans. Growing up has made me see that while most of us like to think we are able to be civil about differing viewpoints, most of us would much rather only listen to people who agree with us and not the opposing view. I for one would find it incredible if I could find a woman who could disagree with me on different views, because even though we would disagree, if done with civility even in a relationship, we could at the end of the day, still love each other regardless of our views. I feel like the world is missing this as a whole in a lot of places. u/vadwar

4. Good sense of humor 

Great sense of humor. u/HelloSunshine2. To add to this humor doesn’t translate well across cultures. It isn’t a dealbreaker if you don’t laugh at my jokes or mannerisms, just don’t fake a laugh as it is very easy to tell when someone is fake laughing. Now if you belly laugh naturally, spit up your drink, snort, or chuckle like you are in physical pain that’s the good stuff most people stay for. u/TheMonocleRogue

5. Takes an effort 

When he takes an active interest in planning/participating in dates when he’s considerate of feelings and able to communicate effectively when he’s kind to animals and people when he’s emotionally mature, he tells you if he’s going to be busy and might not be able to respond to a text for a while, he has a job and can take care of himself, he’s confident and knows what he wants out of a relationship/life in general, he keeps you fed, and he’s sweet and funny. u/plutoforprez

6. Being considerate towards others 

When meeting someone new, they instantly gain my respect when they consider possible accommodations someone could need, like asking if I’m alright with them vaping/smoking before doing so. Once I was a part of a potluck with co-workers and a newer guy asked if anyone had any dietary restrictions/allergies. We became great friends. And when they acknowledge someone’s holiday even when they don’t celebrate it themself. I’m not Jewish but thank you and I hope you have a happy Hanukkah too, random lady I checked out as a cashier at a grocery store once! u/SenorAnanas

7. Healthy relationship with their mother

See how they treat their mother. If they are a grown man and still rely on their mother to do everything for them, then be cautious because they will expect you to do that. On the other hand, if THEY treat their mom well, that’s a green flag. It’s totally fine for mothers to do things for their grown children and in most cases they will be happy to do things for their children, but if the guy is doing things for his mom to help her out in her later life, that is a green flag for sure. u/MinimalSamuel

8. Behavior towards family 

Obviously, this isn't true for everyone (especially if you come from a shitty family) but your attitude towards family. One of the things I admire most about my partner is the fact that he makes time every single week to eat dinner with his parents. He does manual labor around their house, and just generally was raised right. It's extremely attractive. u/sugarplumbuttfluck. My dad normally mows his lawn but recently tore his meniscus. For the past 3 weeks, I’ve gone over and mowed the lawn for them. Normally takes an hour or so, but man do I feel forever indebted to them for putting up with my two sisters and myself. Reddit

9. Genuine attention 

The biggest green flag is probably, genuine attention. That's why love bombing is a favorite of abusers. Everyone needs attention. Not everyone has a ton of attention to give. Attention takes time. It takes consideration, imagination and desire. You have to want to give someone attention. So naturally, it's a shortcut for people who want to make a strong positive impression to love bomb someone for a short period - this creates a kind of bank they can use later or a source of gaslighting. Anyway, if you can tell that the attention is there, it's given freely, it's genuine, with no strings, etc. it's probably the number one thing that couples need. Mutual attention. And with that comes talking, listening, etc. Other considerations like hobbies and interests are really just proxies for attention. Two people with similar hobbies will have an easier time giving attention because each person enjoys similar things, so it "costs" less energy to give someone that attention. Think about it that way. u/chcampb

10. Taking an active interest

On the first date with my now-fiancé, we were talking about books and I was telling him about some of my favorites. A few weeks later, he told me that he’d bought and read one of the books I’d mentioned and wanted to discuss it with me. It showed me he took my opinions and recommendations seriously, that he actively wanted to find things we have in common and that he wasn’t ashamed of reading women's fiction (I hate that term but it’s such a huge trend that men don’t tend to read books that are primarily aimed at women!). u/Every_Difference365