You’re told to brace for obstacles in life. Simon Sinek says that’s exactly the problem

Many of us are constantly worried about what can go wrong when we plan something, and so we kind of restrict ourselves just to avoid mishaps. An optimist, Simon Sinek, shared exactly why this is wrong. In a video, the speaker shared a brutally honest example of skiers and related it to how we prepare for our everyday lives. He noted that while scraping through the snow, they’re not focused on the trees or the mountains; they’re focused on the route to keep moving forward. They’re looking at open paths but when we picture life goals, we’re constantly bracing for obstacles. It holds us back from using our full potential and achieving success.

Sinek began with a very bold statement. “The human brain cannot comprehend the negative,” he said. According to him, our minds are “incapable” of holding onto the cons, but for us overthinkers, we’re already in the negative, challenging his perspective. So he shared an example. He said, “Don’t think of an elephant,” but surprisingly, the first thing most may have visualized is an elephant. “You can’t tell the brain not to do something,” he remarked. Sinek noted how we “reinforce” a concept when we put it in the negative. He then shared a noteworthy instance about pilots and skiers. 

“It is well known in the pilot community that when you tell a pilot not to hit the obstacle, they'll hit the obstacle because what they're doing is focusing on the obstacle,” Sinek explained. The same goes with skiers. Skiers don’t watch for trees; they’re not told “don’t hit a tree,” because then all their vision will circle back to a tree, and then they’re bound to hit it. “You won't be able to find a path because all you see is millions of trees,” he added. Instead, skiers are told to follow the path. This way, they’re actively looking for a way forward, which subconsciously keeps them from moving towards obstacles. "When you change something from negative to affirmative, it has a huge impact," Sinek noted.

Sharing yet another example, the speaker highlighted how we focus on telling children what “to do” instead of what “not to do.” “You tell a child, ‘Eat at the table,’ not ‘Don’t eat on the couch,’” the speaker pointed out. The same applies to our daily lives as well. If we focus on the obstacles, all we’re going to see are the obstacles, and then we're heading straight for it before even realizing it, because our vision is compromised. Instead, if we tell our brain to focus on the path, we will actively be looking for a way through. “It's your choice how you choose to perceive your own career. It's literally perspective,” Sinek remarked. According to a study published by Science Direct, the way we perceive our difficulties can determine outcomes. 

It was noted that challenges of different kinds are part of life, but how we think about these challenges and perceive them can greatly influence the result. The study revealed that a person’s response to any difficult situation is shaped by their efficiency, optimism, and their general belief about dealing with the situation. If a person believes that the challenge can harm them, the result is most likely to be negative. Whereas, if a person doesn’t focus on the obstacles and sees it as an event that can lead to growth and learning, it would likely yield positive outcomes. 

Sinek conveyed something similar; he suggests not focusing on the negative in the first place, and should they arise, our focus should always be on the “path.” It’s winning advice. @ofnir123 shared, “This very mentality is helping me cut back on alcohol. I don't think ‘don't think tonight’ anymore, I think, ‘How can I fill my evening? Which project do I work on? What fun game do I play?" I focus on what I want to do, instead of what I want to avoid.” @KoiAcademy added, “That elephant example made me laugh but also gave me such a surprise. Our brain truly isn't capable of comprehending the negatives; it's our own narratives and choices that force it to.” 

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