Robert De Niro opens up about how raising biracial children changed his life

Hollywood icon Robert De Niro recently shared heartfelt reflections on his love for his six children and the complexities of raising biracial kids in today’s world. “I love my children, just being with them. When you have the good moments, you forget about the ones that weren’t good,” he told Us Weekly. De Niro’s legendary career includes iconic films like Taxi Driver, The Godfather, and Mean Streets, but his personal life has had its ups and downs.

De Niro’s journey as a father began with his marriage to his Taxi Driver co-star Diahnne Abbott in 1976. Together, they had a son, Raphael, and De Niro adopted Abbott’s daughter, Drena, from a previous relationship. After more than a decade, the couple divorced in 1988. Later, De Niro dated Toukie Smith, with whom he shares twin sons, Aaron Kendrick and Julian Henry. Although their relationship ended in 1995, his family continued to grow.

In 1997, De Niro married actor and philanthropist Grace Hightower. They welcomed their son Elliot in 1998 and their daughter Helen in 2011. The couple remained together for over 20 years before divorcing in 2018. Reflecting on the challenges of parenting, especially as children grow older, De Niro noted, “Sometimes you’re the last person they want to deal with. It’s like when you walk your kids to school, and they get older and they don’t want to hold your hand or kiss you goodbye,” he shared with PEOPLE.

Robert De Niro opened up about being worried for his kids, during an appearance on "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon." “My children are all half black and I don’t have … even me, I take certain things for granted … When people say that they tell their kids, ‘Keep your hands when you’re stopped by any cops, keep your hands on the steering wheel, don’t make a sudden move, don’t put your hands below, don’t do this,’ you understand that. That’s scary. That has to change,” he said. “When you become a parent, there are certain things that you become more aware of, more sensitive about,” he told PEOPLE.

When asked about his kids following his career path, the actor said it was up to them. “For my kids, I tell them, ‘If you want to be an actor or you want to do this or that, that’s fine as long as you’re happy. Just don’t sell yourself short.’ That’s the most I would say—push yourself a little more and reach for what you really think it is you want to do. Don’t be afraid,” he said, before adding, “It’s important for them to find their own lane.”

He also spoke about the importance of helping his kids find their creativity. De Niro touched upon how his parents—artists Virginia and Robert De Niro Sr.—helped nurture his own creativity. “It’s not like my family sat around the table and talked about art, but they led by example. Expression through music, movies, acting, dance, whatever—those are expressions that people need to connect to,” said De Niro. “Whether it’s going to museums, theaters, movies, TV, whatever. We need that. It’s part of our culture, part of our society. It’s essential that it’s there.”

This article originally appeared 2 years ago.