Racist man forbids daughter from introducing her Black boyfriend to bigot grandparents

Here's some news that will make you go, "Wait, what year are we in again?" A user on Reddit took to the website in order to discuss his decision to forbid his daughter from introducing her African-American boyfriend to her racist grandparents. While he claimed to be, other things aside, a liberal supporter of inter-racial relationships, the father has been condemned for his actions. The father, who goes by the username Mixedwoes on Reddit, explained his predicament on the forum "Am I the A*shole?" This is a subreddit dedicated to explaining difficult situations and receiving opinions about whether someone was in the wrong for the decision they took. Users who responded to his Reddit post stated that he was simply enabling racism and perpetuating a system of bigotry.

In his post, he wrote so as to provide readers some much-needed context: Let me just preface this by saying this - I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM WITH INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS. Now that the air is clear, let me continue. My daughter (Anna) has recently started to date an African American man (Jamal). While I'm not exactly what you would refer to as "liberal," he's a nice young man and as long as my daughter is happy, I'm happy. The problem is Anna is rather naive about the community she lives in. While her friends are quite content to see a relationship like her's, more than a few tongues are wagging in the community and a few people have privately expressed their concern to me. As I said, I have no problem with mixed relationships and I've set them straight, but I am painfully aware of how these matters are viewed by certain segments of the population.

Now, that sounds fair enough, right? Just a concerned father looking out for his daughter and making sure she isn't the target of a deeply problematic mischaracterization. However, the issue begins when his parents, that is, Anna's grandparents, are set to come to town for a visit. The father continued: My parents are planning to come and stay with us for a week and Anna expressed a desire to introduce Jamal to them now that things were getting more serious between them. I told her on no uncertain terms that this wasn't going to happen. I may have no problem with Jamal, but they absolutely will, and even when the relationship ends they won't forget it. They might even go as far as to cut her off entirely. Anna was extremely upset by this and implied I was a racist and more concerned with what my parents think than how she feels. As I said, I know my parents. They simply aren't okay with mixed relationships and if Anna were to bring Jamal over even as a friend, they would be furious both at her and me.

Well, there it is. But wait. It gets much, much worse. Mixedwoes attempts to validate his stance by comparing his daughter's interracial relationship to the length of the skirt his now-wife was wearing when he first introduced her to his parents. He stated: Anna is currently staying with Jamal and doesn't want to speak with me right now. My wife stands by me given that she knows very well how my parents are (they had a problem with her for months over the length of the skirt she wore when I introduced her to them, for Christ's sake), but a close friend I confided in told me that I have behaved like an *ss and that I needed to focus more on my daughter than pleasing my parents. No advice needed, but I have to know. Have I been an *ss?

The top answer, written thoughtfully by PublicIdea, responds to his question perfectly. They replied: You're the *sshole. Has it occurred to you to... PROTECT your daughter from the racists you are supposedly so against? Anti-racism isn't popular in "the community" when you define that as white people of a certain age and class. It never has been and never will be. Dr King's dream wasn't to ask politely for people to be "not exactly liberal but okay," then give up and abandon black people and their white partners to the wolves if they say no... You and the other white moderates are the jewel in their crown; they need to win your complicity before they expand their empire. You are the oil in their tanks; your actions fuel their advance. Do "your daughter" a favor and tell her you've chosen not to be a dad to her because it might affect your little popularity contest. She deserves to know the truth. Jamal deserves to know you place your little neighborhood pecking order above his safety and freedom, too... You're not just "not liberal," you are the enemy of [edit: antiracists].  Be a DAD. Get your [attitude] together before you get someone seriously hurt with your wishy-washy bull[crap]. Be part of the solution or get out of the way. And might I add, your parents are who Dr. King meant by "White Citizen's Council-er." How many black people did they attack at soda fountains and city halls? How many have they intimidated out of their neighborhood? Have you even asked? Ball's in your court. BOOM. Mic. Drop.