She wrestled with a moral dilemma after lashing out at her former best friend for trying to convince her fiance to rethink their relationship.
A woman recently approached the r/AmItheAsshole Reddit community with a moral dilemma after lashing out at her former best friend for trying to convince her fiance to rethink their relationship. "AITA for telling my now ex-best friend that her personality made her ugly?" u/creepystuffthrow asked the subreddit before launching into a shocking story of betrayal and broken friendships. "My fiance Mike is a smoking hot man. I mean he is model handsome, whereas I am a plus-sized gothic woman that isn't considered conventionally attractive. He is also sapiosexual. We started long-distance and he didn't even ask for a photo for weeks," the OP explained.
"He said my brain was enough for him, and he has proven that every day. We have been together 5 years now, living together for 4 and I feel adored and practically worshipped," she continued. "A week ago, he proposed. He did a perfect proposal with most of our friends and family involved. I noticed Julie wasn't there, who has been my best friend since we were 10, but I didn't think much of it. Julie is also extraordinarily beautiful and is an aspiring influencer." A few days after their engagement, Mike shared a very disturbing conversation he had with Julie before he popped the question to u/creepystuffthrow.
"Mike sat me down two days ago and he looked very grim. I asked him what was wrong and he handed me his phone to show me a message thread with Julie where he asked for help planning his proposal. It started off fairly innocently where she asks questions about things such as the ring and locale," the Reddit user recounted. Things quickly took an unexpected and unpleasant turn when Julie started badmouthing her long-time friend to her soon-to-be-husband. "After that, she sent him questions like if he really wants to marry me due to my weight and health conditions (I have PCOS and fibro.) Mike has been helping me with diet and exercise, and I've lost over 120 pounds. She's well aware of his encouragement and support, so this came out of left field," u/creepystuffthrow wrote.
"He said yes and went back to trying to plan when she started bringing up my 'flaws,' like my skin not being constantly clear or my slightly crooked nose. He flat out asked her what she was implying, and she said that someone as handsome as he is should be with someone like her, not me. His response was a bit cruel, to be honest. He said that she wasn't intelligent enough to be attracted to and her interests were vapid. She blocked him," OP revealed. As crushed as she was by her friend's betrayal, the Reddit user reached out to her friend in the hopes of talking about it. However, a reconciliation was not in the cards.
"I sent her a message asking her to come over to talk and she freaked out because she already knew what it was about. She started making excuses at first, but then she just flat out said that I wasn't pretty enough to deserve him and that it wasn't fair she was beautiful and single. I sent her a message back saying that she was beautiful, but her personality has made her ugly and then I blocked her," the soon-to-be bride recounted. Although the OP believes her former friend's action warranted such a reaction from her side, their mutual friends are split over who's in the wrong.
"Some are saying I should be more sympathetic because she was brutally dumped recently (he cheated and got his affair partner pregnant.) A few are mad that I insulted her as I did. I feel bad because I did insult her and I know that she's always felt stupid compared to me and that I hit her in her insecurities. My mom and Julie's mom are also BFFs, and this has unfortunately affected their friendship and my mom is also a little upset that I didn't 'take the high road,' but she understands that my friendship with Julie was over regardless," she shared, concluding her post by asking fellow Reddit users whether she went too far. Not many seemed to think so. Many assured the OP that taking the high road is overrated and that her ex-best friend deserved to be removed from her life.
Here's what some of them had to say: