People share the biggest green flags they look for in women and it's key to a happy relationship

Attractive qualities in a woman

Society often emphasizes physical appearance when considering a woman's attractiveness, but it's the internal qualities that truly leave a lasting impression. Confidence, a sense of humor, kindness, and empathy all reflect a woman's character and how she treats others. Ultimately, it's a blend of these traits that fosters meaningful connections. Here are 10 green flags in women, as shared by men on Reddit: 

1. Dealing with conflict properly 

Fighting and/or approaching conflict in a healthy manner. During one of my early fights with my GF (now wife of 15 years) I was surprised that even though she was still mad, she clearly said "I'm upset when you did X, because of (something in her past). I know that past event is not your fault, but I'm still feeling some kind of way, we should talk later after I've processed a bit." Wayyyyy different than my past relationship. No silent treatment, no hiding emotions and exploding later, firm about feelings while taking accountability, honest apologies... It's great. We still have conflicts, and even yell from time to time, but they are productive in the end. u/broman55

2. Emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence will apply to men as well. Anyone who takes the time to wonder WHY they feel a certain way vs. acting on it out of instinct is a gift. I’ve never been in a relationship like this in my life, We can talk anything out peacefully. No arguments in years, no insults or hurt feelings, emotional intelligence is the key. u/MolagMoProblems. This! Didn’t realize how a relationship was really supposed to be until I had a partner like this. If you have emotional intelligence, everything else comes easier. u/Reev3rb

3. Kindness

Straight-up kindness. I met my wife 11 years ago and fell in love pretty quickly. She is the kindest person I have ever met. Doesn't matter the situation, she approaches all of them with a serenity that I have never been able to match. Every dog gets love, every baby gets ogled at. Do you need some help? She is there with work boots on. Homeless? She keeps snacks and cash on hand to give out. I'm having a bad day. She will go above and beyond to make sure I know that I am loved. u/Infinite-Ambassador5

4. Thoughtfulness

Thoughtfulness goes hand in hand with a lot of traits. My girlfriend is the most thoughtful partner I’ve ever had. I missed out on a job at my dream company and she made me a “feeling blue” package full of blue snacks I like with a sweet card. I’ll have a bad day she’ll surprise me with a dessert or a drink I like or something like that. She threw me my first surprise birthday party at an escape room with my friends because she knew I loved them. When a partner takes time to genuinely think about you and the things you like/dislike and thinks about things from your perspective, it’s about the greenest flag I can think of. u/shockwave_supernova

5. Being clean 

My wife, among other zillion virtues, has this consideration for others/cleaning discipline. So we would go to hotels and she would make the bed, remove trash, etc. to the point that half the hotels / Airbnbs ask me if we even used the room. It’s something that we don’t even talk about but makes my eyes sparkle. She knows they will have to change blankets and everything but thinks that an almost pristine room is a good image for the cleaning person to start with. u/cangarejos

6. Having their partner be emotionally open

Someone who ACTUALLY is ok with their man being emotionally honest and open. A lot of women say they want that, but what they really want is a guy who'll call things cute and shed a single manly tear at Titanic, but will say "well that's embarrassing" if he actually cries over childhood trauma or something. If you're mature and healthy enough to realize emotional honestly comes with awkward and difficult things that you probably don't want to deal with, but will deal with anyway, then that's a massive green flag. u/JackofScarlets

7. Giving respect to others

There are a couple in my opinion. Respect is a big one. I'm not dating anyone shallow, abusive, or disrespectful to other people. It's a big indicator of something flawed in their personality. The biggest one for me though, and this is gonna sound weird, is when they text you back after the date ends. This isn't to say the guy shouldn't text back either, but seeing it from the other perspective really enforces the belief that they're interested in seeing you again. u/LoneRedditor123

8. Investing in their partner's passion

She shows a genuine interest in something I’m passionate about. For example: my cousin’s friend was over, and she was asking about football, and she’s a Minnesota fan (bless her heart), and she understood players on the team and general a fair bit more than the average person, but she wanted to know more. So she was asking about other players, alignments, where everyone goes when lining up, etc. We’re at the beach and so we go and throw the football around, and she’s asking about how to throw it properly, I’m explaining it, she’s getting better at throwing very quickly, and I’m gonna be honest, she was already attractive, but it might have been one of the sexiest things a woman has ever done without being sexy. And she wasn’t trying to be flirty with her questions, or ask but not really care, like just to be polite, no she really wanted to know more about football and it was a real turn-on. u/Praying_Lotus

9. Making an effort 

She makes an effort. A lot of women have the kind of mentality where they are doing a man a favor by dating him so therefore he needs to romance her and be thoughtful and do all this stuff for her while she does the bare minimum. (A lot of men might do it too, but I don't date men so don't really know) It's a huge green flag if she puts a lot of effort into the relationship as well. When I was a lot younger, a woman I was dating showed up with McDonald's (I love Mcdonalds), flowers and a 5-pound bag of gummi bears. I was absolutely dumbfounded. I put a lot of effort into making partners feel special and loved. I expect the same thing. If they aren't good at it, that's fine as long as they put the effort in. u/CarpeMofo

10. Willing to grow as a person 

That she’s willing to grow as a person. I’ve met and dated far too many girls who think they’re finished, that they’ve reached the top of the mountain and we should all bow before their greatness. My wife is constantly trying to learn more and gets excited to share new things she’s learning with me. Just the humility to know you still have a lot to learn is not just attractive in a romantic partner, it’s just a good character trait in general. u/HighlightOk7535.

This article originally appeared 1 year ago.