People rally around woman who told her husband that he's 'too broke to be so sexist'

While the world has progressed regarding patriarchal and traditional household roles, some issues persist. u/Ok_Scedule1138 shared a story about her husband refusing to fulfill his assigned role, forcing her to stand up for herself in a way that felt harsh. She wrote, "So my husband comes from a 'traditional' family. Mum's a stay-at-home mom. The father is the sole provider. I come from the opposite - my mother pretty much forbade me from ever being financially dependent on a man and drilled that into me early on."

She further added, "My husband worked hard to unlearn the values he saw replicated at home. He (more often than not) pulled his weight at home and was an engaged and present father and a genuine partner. The one thing that grinds my gears is how much weight he puts on the opinions of his family. I get that we all want our parents to be proud of us, but this is too much." For context, her in-laws were staying with them for two weeks. Usually, they followed a schedule where she made breakfast, lunch was arranged for work or school, and her husband made dinner. They usually had a cleaning lady, but with her on holiday, everyone was cleaning up after themselves, and it worked fine.

"My in-laws hate that I'm 'one of those modern women.' They hate that I work, they hate that I don't find my purpose in being a wife and mother and they hate that my husband pulls his weight at home. We spoke pretty frankly early on, where I established my boundaries and told them I wouldn't be chastised about how I live my life in my home. When I am a guest in their home, I accommodate their ways and play the daughter-in-law they wish I was. They have, for the most part, respected this," the daughter-in-law revealed. Everything was okay until one day when she came home close to dinner time. She was hungry and came home at quarter past six or half past six while their dinner time was at 7.

The wife went to take a post-work shower, but when she returned to serve dinner, she found out it wasn't ready. She asked her husband about dinner, but his mom answered that he hadn't made anything. "She told me I needed to do my duty as a wife and cook for my family," she continued. "My coward of a husband still wasn't looking at me. I just walked away and ordered a takeaway. I dished up for me and my kids and we sat at the table to eat. My husband and his parents served themselves and joined us," she added.

Later, her mother-in-law told her she was a failure and should do better. The wife turned to her husband, asking if he had anything to add. "He said his mother had a point and it wouldn't hurt if I acted 'more like a proper woman' and 'took better care of my home and children.' He said tradition was tradition for a reason and it was kind of insulting that I thought I was too good for how he was raised." It was where she couldn't take it anymore. "I told him tradition won't allow a man on 35k to support a family of 5 and he was too broke to be so sexist." she wrote. She regretted saying that in front of her kids, but she was tired of pulling her husband's weight and dealing with his parents. So, she took to Reddit to ask if she was wrong in this situation.

u/Ryoko_kusanagi69 wrote, "I love that you ordered enough. You 'did your duty and fed your family, so they can't be mad. AND you did it as an income provider also! It is like a double 'kill them with kindness' kick." u/the_harlinator pointed out, "The kids also got to hear the husband and mother-in-law degrade the wife as a human and a woman. It's not the worst thing that her kids saw her standing up for herself." u/Academic_Muscle8534 remarked, "If a traditional woman is supposed to cook, why didn't the mil cook dinner for her family?"