Divorce lawyer reveals a simple 'Walk & Talk' hack that can save a marriage

It takes effort to keep a marriage, especially when things aren’t going well. A New York divorce lawyer, James Sexton, spoke with podcaster Codie Sanchez and revealed one habit that can “save a marriage.” In her post shared on February 15, the man mentioned a “Walk and Talk” theory that is known to benefit partners in a relationship. It is a simple practice that involves consistency, time, concern, and so many other factors that are deeply rooted in the foundation of a relationship. Many people agree with the crux of Sexton’s message. 

The lawyer revealed that many couples have the practice of going on a walk once a week. While they’re out on this walk, they have an agenda of some sort. For instance, Sexton revealed an agenda where they asked each other, what are the "3 things I did this week that made you feel loved,” and “1 or 2 things that I could have done better or that made you feel unloved or unseen.” Simply asking these two questions subconsciously pushes partners to reflect on their relationship as well as their individual roles towards each other. 

The lawyer noted that if the opposite person cannot come up with three things that made them feel loved, there is a problem, and it needs to be discussed and fixed. But here’s what’s helping. The consistency of this weekly walk ensures that a duo is invested in their relationship and actively working on it. It also gives space for open communication to highlight problems before they rot away and destroy the entire foundation of the relationship. Just knowing that there is a problem and saying it out loud is way more impactful, and considering doing this regularly can keep communication more open and honest. 

"James Sexton has seen enough court orders to know a good routine is more powerful," the caption of the post read. According to the PEW Research Center, four in ten divorces occur within the first decade of marriage. 16% reportedly occurs within the first five years of marriage. The highest (24%) of divorces occurred between 5 and 9 years of marriage. This was followed by divorces among those married for 25 years or more (22%). The divorce rate has decreased over the decades, but even a single divorce affects two lives. And it stems from inconsistencies. A study revealed that around 75% of participants noted “lack of commitment” to be a reason for divorce. This was listed highest among other issues.

“It became insurmountable. It got to a point where it seemed like he was no longer really willing to work [on the relationship],” one of the participants noted. The next two reasons highlighted were infidelity and conflict among partners. Many people agreed that communicating and maintaining consistency is a good way to prevent the rise of problems. @leonardofreixas wrote, “Routine over drama every time, consistency wins cases and life.” @gregorylovesjiujitsu pointed out another benefit for the 'Walk and Talk,' “Moving in motions together builds a deep bond in your brain's limbic system, too. That’s why exercising, dancing, training in a martial art, or just walking together is so beneficial. Oxytocin release!” 

You can follow Codie Sanchez (@codiesanchez) on Instagram for more content on lifestyle and relationships.

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