New mom of 7-week-old baby gets no help from husband including basic tasks, asks if she's wrong

Balancing motherhood and recovery after childbirth is already a daunting challenge, but for one woman, her struggle has been exacerbated by an unsupportive husband and an overbearing mother-in-law. A 27-year-old mom of a seven-week-old—who goes by user u/EuphoricWitness755 on Reddit—explained the exhaustion, neglect, and emotional turmoil she is feeling. “I don’t even know where to start,” the first-time mom began. “I feel like I’m drowning, but maybe I’m the one at fault for expecting too much.” She described her life with her daughter, Daisy, who has colic and cries constantly.

“Isn’t a mother supposed to be able to comfort her child? I can’t even manage that.” While recovering from a C-section, she described her pain, sleep deprivation, and a lack of support from her husband, Mark, who is 31. “He works long hours and says he needs his rest, so I handle the nights alone. Every feeding, every diaper change, every midnight sobbing session (both hers and mine)—it’s all me,” she shared. Making matters worse, her mother-in-law, Susan, moved into their home three weeks ago after an argument with her father-in-law. Far from offering support, Susan has taken over the living room, made passive-aggressive comments about the cleanliness of the house, and refused to help with the baby.

“She has been treating me like a live-in maid,” the woman wrote. “She doesn’t cook for herself or anyone else. Instead, she’ll drop hints like, ‘It’d be nice if there were some tea,’ while I'm trying to juggle a screaming baby.” Susan’s behavior reached unacceptable levels when she hosted a “book club” in their home. The new mom hid in the nursery, overwhelmed by the noise, and judgmental comments from Susan’s friends about the state of the house. “I wanted to scream. Instead, I hid in the nursery and cried,” she said. On top of everything, their dog fell ill, vomiting around the house for days.

Mark refused to help, claiming it was her responsibility since the dog was “her idea.” Her breaking point came when she developed mastitis, a painful infection, and had a fever of 102°F. Despite her weakened state, Mark dismissed her request for help, citing work obligations. Exhausted and starving, the woman begged Mark to either ask Susan to leave or help her with the chaos. He responded, “You’re the one on maternity leave. What else do you have to do?” He stormed out, leaving her to manage everything alone. She said, “I feel like I’m failing—at being a mom, a wife, a person. Maybe they're right. As maybe I’m selfish for expecting help. Maybe I’m a bad mother because I can’t stop my baby from crying. Maybe this is all my fault.”

Comments flooded in, offering both empathy and blunt advice. u/JanetInSpain said, “Stop begging! You need to pack a bag and take yourself and the baby anywhere else. Where is your family? Any family that you can go stay with. Hell, call your father-in-law and ask to go stay there. You are way beyond maxed out and your husband is a loser and abuser. Your mother-in-law has no business being there." u/JustMe518 added, “You’re being abused. Just because he isn’t hitting you doesn’t mean it’s not abuse.” u/bjr711 suggested, “First throw your mother-in-law out, second throw your sorry ass husband out. Third take your child to a new pediatric doctor. They have things for colic these days."