Pregnant woman refuses to attend sister-in-law's wedding due to an uncomfortable dress code

Compromise is the basic tenet of every relationship. In the absence of compromise, no relationship can survive. However, the question is, how much compromise is too much compromise? Should people alter themselves and take different calls if it affects something as important as health so that a relationship can be salvaged? It is exactly what u/throwawaythechanges wanted to ask when her in-laws began to pressure her into following a dress code she was uncomfortable with during her pregnancy. It all started due to a scuffle she was having with her sister-in-law, where the entire family was supporting the latter.

In the post, the mom-to-be explained in detail about her conflict with her sister-in-law who was preparing for her wedding. Like most of the girls, she also had elaborate plans when it came to her wedding. These plans include a dress code. The dress code includes a black tie, long sleeves and floor-length gowns. She was adamant that everyone follow the dress code as if the success of the whole event depended upon it.

The woman, unfortunately, could not adhere to these rules. She is 34 weeks pregnant and becomes overheated quickly. Therefore, during the time of her SIL wedding, she prefers wearing light clothing to keep her body cool and comfortable. The whole event will take place outside in the afternoon in Southern USA, because of which even the environment was not in her favor. There is no way she will survive 8 hours in so much heat wearing a long-sleeved floor-length gown.

Since it was a family event, the Reddit user knew that her presence was crucial and expected, and she did not want to disappoint anyone. She began searching for dresses that went with the theme and were also comfortable for her. There were some beautiful dresses that she ended up finding for the event, such as an A-line lace black dress, a tulle maternity maxi dress and an embellished navy blue maternity dress. Since they did not fit the wedding's theme, her sister-in-law rejected each one of them.

Later, the woman and sister-in-law began arguing. She stood her ground that if the SIL did not budge even a little, then it would be impossible for her to attend the wedding. She explained that as a bride, the SIL has all the rights to have a wedding just as she envisioned, but at the same time, as an expecting mother, she needed to prioritize her health. As expected, the SIL got angry and burst out at her. The woman was called selfish and had to hear things like, "For once, it isn't about me and my f*cking baby."

This outburst made the woman more firm in her decision. Though she knew that such a reaction was out of jealousy as her SIL wanted to be the person to give her parents their first grandchild, this was still no way to talk. The whole family is now blaming her, telling her that she is being selfish and unreasonable. In order to garner clarity about the situation, she asked for suggestions on Reddit.

The comment section was supportive of the woman's stance. u/yellange pointed out the flaw in the dress code considering the weather and time, "NTA. Grabbing popcorn and waiting to see how many people actually adhere to said dress code. Please let us know." u/Ok-Profession-9372 was in agreement with the user and did not think that such attire was suitable for an event in the afternoon, "NTA. Also, you should mention to her that a black-tie wedding traditionally happens after 5:30 p.m. She should adjust her attire for a garden party, which would be entirely appropriate."