A supermarket stranger scolded a mom for not dressing her toddler 'like a girl.' Her witty one-liner stopped the lecture cold
The entitled lady argued that she should make her baby wear bows so people know she's a girl
People can sometimes be really nosy. A mom (u/scaredvacation33) experienced it firsthand when a stranger questioned her for inappropriately dressing her baby girl. It so happened that an elderly woman misgendered her 18-month-old daughter and blamed her for not making it obvious through her dressing. Pissed, the mom retaliated, refusing to let her daughter conform to traditional gender stereotypes. Her post, shared on July 15, has received over 6,500 upvotes on Reddit.
AITAH for telling a random stranger idc if they can tell my child’s gender
by u/ScaredVacation33 in AITAH
The bow debate
The author was at a grocery store with her almost 5-year-old son and baby girl when the incident occurred. She explained that her daughter was wearing a blue tank top with princess-style bows and pink stripes. However, since she didn’t have fully grown hair, an old woman at the checkout misgendered her while complimenting. When the mother corrected the elderly woman, she blamed her for not dressing her daughter appropriately. "The lady then told me that I should style her hair or put bows in her hair so that it’s obvious to other people that she’s a girl," the author recounted.
The perfect comeback
Pestered by the intrusiveness, the mom responded by saying that she had no intention of showcasing their baby’s gender to the whole world. At this, the elderly woman was furious and swore at the author. “How people who don’t pay someone’s mortgage, put food on their table, or contribute to any of their household resources think that they have the right to dictate how somebody lives and what they do," she asked. Later on, when the author shared the episode with a co-worker, she was again blamed for overreacting to the situation.
Why boundaries matter
Although the author's co-worker believes she went too far in avenging the entitled old woman, it was likely the best response to nosiness. Researchers at PsychTests surveyed 9,041 people and found more than 70% offer unsolicited advice to strangers. Similarly, the research observed that 25% fail to consider how their words or actions affect others, much like the elderly woman in the Reddit post. "Unwelcome advice-givers are generally well-meaning, but they fail to recognize that fine line between courtesy and intrusiveness," explained Dr. Ilona Jerabek, president of PsychTests. "Rather than examining their own faults, they try to fix other people's.
'People need to mind their own business'
Meanwhile, readers agreed that the mother's response was justified and accurate because that boomer lady didn’t have anything to do with their kids, let alone misgender them. u/Square_twist8012 commented, “The stranger was out of line, but the coworker doubling down somehow makes the story even wilder.” u/anothertypicalcmmnt said, “I think she was just embarrassed she got it wrong, and rather than just accept she made a mistake, she decided to make her embarrassment your fault for not making it ‘obvious’ your toddler is female. Ridiculous for sure.”
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