Mothers are already tired and burned out from planning every event that they want someone to take reins on their birthdays.
Women are usually the ones who are planning everyone's birthdays throughout the year. So when it comes to their birthday, if they say they do not want to do anything, they mean it, which is on their partner to make the day special for her. However, that's not how every partner or husband thinks and bombards their wives with a thousand questions. A mom of 4, Paige Turner—who goes by @sheisapaigeturner on TikTok—says in her video, "Have you ever wondered why women on their birthdays or Mother's Day always say, 'I wanna do nothing. I wanna do absolutely nothing. Honestly, I don't care what we do or what it looks like. I just don't wanna plan or coordinate anything.'"
She continues, "They say, 'I don't wanna do anything, okay? Can you just take the reins and you run from here?' And the husband will go, 'Sure, of course, babe.'" And then, she talks about how the husbands start asking questions about what they should be doing, not realizing this is what their wives were avoiding. "'So, what do you think? You can do a massage or do you want dinner? And if dinner, I do care where we go. I'll book the reservation. I was thinking of this place or this place, which one do you want? And if you want a massage, can you send me the link? Cause I forgot where you like to go,'" says Turner.
The endless questions keep coming from their husbands. "'And yeah, and what do you want for your birthday, can you send me the link for that? I need the link, so, I can buy it. So, do you mind sending me what you want and I'll buy that for you? And who do you think should watch the kids? I mean, I could call a babysitter, but I don't have the numbers. Can you give me their numbers and maybe I'll call my parents. Do you think I should? Do you mind calling my parents and you can talk to them?'" explains Turner.
"'And do we have anything on that day? What day do you want to do it, by the way? Do you want to do it on your birthday, or do you want to do it on Sunday? Or like, a Saturday easier? Are you taking the day off from work? What day do you want to do it?'" Turner shares that this happens with women all the time and husbands never understand what their wives are asking for. She then talks about what the problem is "Men aren't hearing it because they don't understand what nothing means. We mean we truly want to do nothing. We want to think about nothing, plan nothing. I don't even care where we go to dinner, and if you know me well enough because you're my husband and you should, you'll know what I want to eat. You'll know restaurants that I hate, food that I hate, food that I like because you're my husband."
The video went viral with about 1.5 million views and is captioned, "If your wife tells you she wants to do nothing and plan nothing for her birthday she means it! Many moms are carrying the mental load for their entire families and need a mental break and that is what they are looking for. They do not want to make any more decisions or do any more work!" Women could resonate with what Turner shared. @jeepmama2319 commented, "Last Mother's Day was my birthday and Mother's Day. My husband decided to invite both of our families over for a grill. I got to make all the sides." @ashleymartin086 shared, "But also doing nothing doesn't mean the husband puts all the chores off for me to do the next day." @webberm7 said, "If all he did was drop the kids off at the sitter, cook you dinner and buy you flowers and a cake. Would that be enough?"
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