BTS Army are carrying blue pebbles to concerts for a girl who never got to go: 'Take Abby with you'
Abby's mother, Jamie, wanted to memorialize her 20-year-old daughter's struggle, and these pebbles gave her a start
Trigger Warning: This article contains themes of suicide that some readers may find distressing.
Abby Elder was always so full of energy and smiles that her mom, Jamie Elder, never realized she was in pain. In January 2024, when 20-year-old Abby took her life, Jamie couldn’t help but think of anything else other than her last wish, which had remained unfulfilled: Abby never got to attend her favorite BTS concert. Now, two years after her death, Jamie is gathering the whole world to fulfill her daughter's last wish. Fans and attendees of BTS Army’s concerts are being handed down tiny blue pebbles, along with notes that say, “Take her with you,” as reported by Good Morning America on August 12, 2026, which has gotten 28,000 views since.
The last wish
Abby, a ballet dancer, pianist, and artist, always looked determined but was highly self-critical and hard on herself, so much so that Jamie didn’t realize her struggle until she died. Ever since she was gone, Jamie shifted her grief into planning mode. She wanted to memorialize her name and fulfill her last wish. Her sister, who too had lost her daughter to cancer, became her inspiration, and she handed out blue howlite, tiny turquoise stones, to everyone who attended the funeral.
Validating the pain
Jamie created a Facebook Page, and friends and family started sharing their photos with what they called “Abby’s pebbles.” These tiny blue pebbles became a rampant aid for others struggling with mental health. "I started getting responses from people thanking me for telling the story, and sharing how they'd struggled with their own mental health," Jamie described. Word broke out, and soon, Abby’s Pebbles made their way to a BTS concert.
After completing their military training in South Korea in 2025, BTS Army was returning for the world tour this year. A friend of Jamie who was attending the concert offered to distribute Abby’s Pebbles at the concert. That’s where it started. Jamie posted a video urging other concert attendees to take Abby’s freebies and hand them to others. From crocheted butterflies to BTS fan art and tiny blue pebbles glued to cards, dozens of freebies were handed out, all featuring the same message, “Take her with you.”
Tatyana Montero, a 25-year-old Army from Canada, who too had been handed down the pebbles, didn’t see them until a month later. When she did, she couldn’t help but shed tears. "It felt as if I was hearing this from a friend," she said. "Here I was crying for someone that I didn't know." Touched by Abby’s story, she shared her photos with the freebies and inspired others to join the campaign. As per CBS, her video spread the story like wildfire, and fast forward to today, whenever someone thinks of BTS, they automatically associate it with Abby’s story.
The pain that no one sees
From “Spring Day” to “Truth Untold” and “Butterfly,” BTS’s playlists have been acting as a personal therapist for over 90 million fans across the world who listen to the band. In a study published in JMIR, researchers documented the responses to 11,772 comments on a sad playlist compiled from BTS songs. Analysis revealed that fans use first-person singular pronouns (10.24%) in the comments, which means they find the songs relatable.
19.8% of the fans indicated that BTS’s songs help people with emotional expression and mental health support. Another study published in the Journal of Communication and Management found that 89.6% of the surveyed youth agreed that BTS’s music helped them cultivate self-love and acceptance during difficult times.
Jeanie Chang, a licensed therapist, also believes that the campaign makes sense, given that BTS itself is a strong advocate of mental health. BTS Army is well known for openly sharing their vulnerability, love, heartbreak, depression, and burnout, and how they rose to fame through a vigorous K-pop training system. Listening to them helps people like Abby navigate their dark times and accept reality.
Jamie believes that talking about mental health with campaigns like these is a basic need, as basic as food and water. “This generation of kiddos, and so many in the Army, struggle with their mental health, and BTS's music and their shenanigans have brought them so much joy and pulled them out of dark places," she said.
If you are having thoughts about taking your own life, or know of anyone who is, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433)
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