Mom explains the drawbacks of missing out on moments with children due to technology

Attention is vital when it comes to the upbringing of children. It is important that parents do not neglect them and are attentive to their needs. Moreover, everything related to children goes at such a fast pace, that if parents are involved in something else there is a huge chance that they will miss out on important moments that will never come back. Victoria Yavnyi—who goes by @toriyav on TikTok—is tackling this topic in her recent video in which she explores the impact cellphone consumption ends up having on their children. This video is part of the series named, “Same Day Different Parenting."

The video showcases two scenarios. In this case, one scenario shows Yavnyi paying attention to her kids while in the other she is not and is instead busy with her device. In the first visual, she is seen strolling with her baby both with and without a phone. Thereafter, she is seen playing with her baby with and without a phone. She goes on to showcase many situations where she is present with her child both with and then without technology. Yavnyi told PEOPLE, “I hope to inspire parents. Too often we become shrouded in the chaos of life. Work, stress, finances, etc. It’s easy to turn to our devices & social media for an escape to help calm our minds.”

She adds that though self-peace should be prioritized, children should also be a pivotal part of their parent's life. It is not right to cast them aside while investing in technology. This is harmful for both parties as it causes parents to lose precious moments in their children's lives. At present it is impossible to lead a life in this world without technology and social media, therefore it is essential that a balance is reached so that parents do not end up with regrets. She elaborates, “Too often I hear stories of regret from parents with children that have already grown up. For me, I just never want to look back with regret and say things like ‘I wish I spent more time with you’. Hindsight is 20/20 and it’s also too late. We have such a small window of time with our little ones and I hope we just all cherish it a little more.”

Yavnyi then goes on to give her opinions about digital documentation. As someone who wants to enjoy every moment of her children's lives recorded, she often gets caught up in making the difficult choice of capturing the moments or living them. She states, “The preservation of memories is incredibly important and a part of who we are as human beings. It's in our nature. Documenting our lives can be traced back to the conception of human art in things as old as cave paintings, however, balancing is crucial.”

This balance can be brought about by a healthy collaboration between the two parents. In Yavnyi's case, it is her husband who reminds her when she gets too focused on capturing every moment that she can take a step back and instead enjoy the moment with her children. She finishes by giving her take on 'sharenting' where parents share content related to children before they are of consenting age, “There’s definitely a spectrum in my opinion. It’s normal for people to want to share pictures and videos of themselves and their families. Before social media, we hung up pictures and shared our photo albums. Then technology advanced and sharing on social media became the new norm. I believe both are acceptable as long as the right intentions are there.”

The comment section of the TikTok video had people sharing their opinions. @angiegibson050 asked people to be more understanding when it comes to mothers, "It’s okay to be both. We are still someone outside of mothers". This video gave a realization to @saraahcunningham, "I love these videos. They make me realize I need to put my phone down."