Employee took 7 days off for his grandma’s funeral. His manager called it 'terrible timing' before sending a video call link

A good paycheck at the end of the month is not the only thing that makes a job worthwhile. Even though it matters, how employees are treated matters just as much. In a post shared by George Stern, who shares exchanges between employees and employers on his Instagram account @georgesternleadership, an employee informed their manager of a week-long bereavement leave due to their grandma's passing. Instead of accepting it, the manager asked for proof and even requested that they join a meeting from their grandmother's wake. The video was shared on July 3, and it received 6.2 million views, 297,000 likes, and 6,339 comments.

Attend the work meeting even though you're at a wake

The conversation began with the employee informing their manager about a week-long bereavement leave because of their grandmother's passing. They were already at the airport, ready to fly to Ohio, when the manager texted a cursory "sorry for your loss" message. This was followed by questions about the leave duration and doubts about the funeral. The employee pointed out that bereavement leave for immediate family is five days.

The manager told them that they would check, to which the employee replied, "She raised me, and yes, grandparents are listed," with an attached screenshot of Page 12 of the Handbook. Still, the manager was not done. They said that it was "terrible timing" since the pitch was on Wednesday. Annoyed, the employee responded, "Deaths are famously inconsiderate about pitch schedules." When the manager suggested they join the Q & A section, the employee flat out replied, "I'll be at a wake. No. Boarding now." 

Proof of death, please

Instead of letting them go, the manager asked if they could show some sort of proof, "Order of service, anything?" The employee coldly replied, "You're asking me to prove my grandmother died? I want you to know I will never forget being asked that." They also informed the manager that the death certificate goes to HR, and not them. They ended the conversation by writing that they will return on Monday, "Please do not contact me before then." One would think the manager would understand when to stop, but they messaged back, "If the Q & A thing changes, just shout."

Employers' support during bereavement leave

Employees have reported that their workplaces often offer little support during bereavement leave. A 2025 Homethrive survey found that one in four employees received no paid time off after the loss of a family member. 24% reported they received only one to two days of paid leave, while 49% had to take additional leave or unpaid leave to attend the funeral. Even in cases of the death of an immediate family member, 21% got no time off, 19% got only one to two days off, and 65% reported their employers gave no other forms of support except for time off. 

Furthermore, the survey revealed that 47% of employees experience a decline in work performance after going through a personal loss. Regarding the employee's case, the manager was more concerned about work, instead of showing empathy towards a grieving employee.

The manager just made a new enemy

People recounted their own stories in the comments about dealing with inhumane bosses. They also noted one important comment from the employee about never forgetting the manager's question. @in2fishing1965 commented, "'I want you to know I will never forget being asked that' translates to, 'You just made me into an enemy and I will make it my life's work to destroy you.'" @joe_n_dtx wrote, "My boss/mentor taught me the only response to this type of situation was 'You take care of your family, we'll take care of the business.'"

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