It can often seem unfair when kids get stuck in the middle of two parents who cannot get along for any reason whatsoever, but this father avoids that.
A couple has the freedom to separate after marriage with no strings attached. However, two parents don't have that choice. Parents, even after a divorce, need to stay in touch with their children, to be able to raise them in the best way possible. In a story shared on Reddit by u/Ambitious-Emotion615, a divorcee talks about his equation with his ex-wife and what his recent confrontation was about. This story is of a separated couple with 2 kids who are now ages 12 and 15. The husband and wife got divorced when the kids were younger, seven years ago.
The ex-husband says that he and his ex-wife share custody of their kids and that the wife remarried a few years ago. Since she remarried, he no longer had to provide her with spousal support. However, the ex-husband said, "Her new husband recently left her. I don't know and am not interested in the particulars." He then went on to add that not only did the other husband leave his ex-wife their house, but he also didn't seem like a "terrible guy." The divorcee then starts with his story. Talking about his ex-wife, he says, "She called me last week to see if I could please help her out with some food. She said that she had run through her budget for food for her and the kids and begged me to help her out." Like any decent person, the man asked her to give him a few minutes and said that he would call her back.
The ex-husband then said, "I talked to my girlfriend, who lives with me, and we agreed that we could spare some food." So, he called his ex back to tell her to come by and pick up a big load of groceries. And that's when it got weird, he says. The ex-wife said that she wanted some cash for Uber Eats instead of groceries, which the man denied. He said, "I have two weeks' worth of food that you can have. But I'm not giving you money for takeout."
The ex-wife didn't take it well and called him a bad person for wanting her to be grateful for his leftovers. He then specified, "Everything I was going to give her was either frozen meat, canned veggies, fresh vegetables from the garden and pasta/rice in unopened bags. I want my kids to eat well." He also added that both his kids hunt and that one of them is a great cook. He knew that his kids would eat the ingredients he was sending his ex-wife. Anyway, he later texted both his kids to let them know that if they were actually going hungry, he would figure everything out. His kids reassured him that they had groceries in the house, it only needed to be used to cook something. They then asked the father if they could borrow some elk and hog roasts and the father happily obliged.
The ex-wife, however, began bad-mouthing the ex-husband, saying he was trying to manipulate her into behaving like a housewife and not buying the kids food. This is why he asked if he was missing out on something. A lot of readers came to his aid. u/DisneyBuckeye said, "NTA - and you're being very generous. It's good that you followed up with the kids to make sure they're being taken care of while they're there." u/MelodramaticMouse went a step further and said, "I doubt that she even wanted to buy Uber Eats. 'The children are hungry' sounds a lot better than 'I saw some cute shoes that I want.'" All things said and done, one important thing divorced couples with kids should remember is that no matter what, you owe it to your kid to not be unfair to them in any way and to make sure they are alright.