Man questions why wife doesn't do Christmas cards—gets an instant reality check on the mental load

Christmas cards are always a fun way to spread holiday cheer, but the time and labor that goes into making them can often be overwhelming for some. From choosing the perfect design and writing heartfelt messages to planning a photoshoot, selecting the best pictures, and mailing them to loved ones, the process can be exhausting. Addressing this, content creator Abby Eckel—known as @abbyeckel on TikTok—shared a now-popular video highlighting the "mental load" associated with creating Christmas cards.

"My husband asked me one year why we did not do Christmas cards and he has never asked me since," Eckel began, recounting how the first and only time her family made Christmas cards was when their eldest child was a baby. She shared, "My husband was like, 'Why don't you ever do Christmas cards? You should do Christmas cards.'" While Eckel wanted her husband to understand the effort behind the tradition, she didn’t want to discourage his enthusiasm. Instead, she agreed to the idea—with the caveat that he would take charge of making the cards that year.

"I was like, 'Yeah! I mean it's just cards, right? Like, why don't you do the Christmas cards?" Eckel recounted, describing how she handed the reins over to her husband. She then explained the extensive steps involved in the process: sourcing a photographer, scheduling a photo shoot, coordinating outfits, choosing a location, reviewing and selecting edits, finding a printing service, and finally mailing the cards to family and friends. As she outlined the responsibilities, her husband stood there, visibly overwhelmed. "He was like, 'Huh!' and I was like, 'Yeah! It's not just Christmas cards. Is it?" she shared.

Eckel further elaborated on why she never found the mental load of creating Christmas cards worthwhile. "Anybody that I would send a Christmas card to, I see regularly. If you do not see me regularly, then you would not be getting a Christmas card from me to just begin with," she explained in the video. Sharing her unpopular opinion about Christmas cards, she added in the caption, "Christmas cards just aren't a priority for me." Her video struck a chord with viewers, drawing a strong response from social media users who appreciated her perspective.

For instance, @greyspacehere wrote, "I love cards, I love sending them and receiving them, but last year, not a single person who got my card mentioned it to me. Or sent one back, or wished me happy holidays. I even checked people got it." Similarly, @_ktfontenot added, "I 100% understand your point of view on this undertaking, but making our annual Christmas cards and calendar is the highlight of Thanksgiving week for me. But if I didn't love the process, I absolutely wouldn't."

@jaxliston commented, "I used to do beautiful Christmas cards every year. It was so much work. I just stopped for one year. A few people asked about it, but that's it. Turns out I didn't need to be doing so much work." @mrs.carr5 wrote, "I personally love Christmas cards. However, I don't go out of my way for specific pictures being taken just for the card. I use what was taken that year. I also keep the cards I'm given each year."

You can follow Abby Eckel (@abbyeckel) on TikTok for more lifestyle content.