Man asks if he's wrong after rejecting wife's handmade birthday gift

From a young age, we’re taught to express gratitude for any gift we receive, regardless of its price. Returning a present, especially to the person who gave it, is often seen as impolite. So when Reddit user u/Quick_Dig3584 shared that he returned a homemade gift from his wife on his birthday, it sparked a lively debate. The husband explained in his post that he told his wife he didn’t want her gift and instead went out to buy the item he actually wanted.

"This has been an ongoing issue that I have talked to her multiple times about," the husband started the post, seeking advice from the people online. "My wife makes less money than me and is the type of person who prefers to make her own gifts for people. The issue is she will do this even if the person doesn't want this. I will use myself as an example. For the past few years, she has made every single gift I have been given." It didn't matter what the husband wished to get for his birthday, the wife would always give him something homemade.

"Last Christmas I asked for new things and I got a homemade scarf. I always get her the stuff she wants. I have talked to her about this multiple times. My birthday was yesterday and I asked her to give me a book. It was only 25 dollars and I sent her the link. I opened the gift and she made some homemade bookmarks. It wasn't even the type of bookmark I liked. They were made from fabric and I like the wooden ones," the husband elaborated in his post. The wife questioned him what was wrong when she probably spotted him making a face at the gift.

Then the husband told her that he didn't want the bookmarks as a gift since he had already made it clear what he wanted as a present many times. "I handed them back and went out to buy the book. We had a big fight when I got back and she claimed I was being ungrateful and a jerk," the post concluded. The confession left the Reddit community divided as some of them supported the husband and others felt he was being rude indeed. 

u/full_babygirl wrote, "You clarified in a comment that she does earn enough to afford the book. It’s just inconsiderate to not listen to your partner when they have repeatedly voiced what they want. Is this a frugal thing or a power play thing where she just decides what you want?" u/notyourhealslut remarked, "Buy the book yourself. I never understood telling people exactly what to get you. It sounds like a demand, not a request. If you know she likes giving handmade gifts, which she thinks are more thoughtful, then think of something handmade you want." u/fubar_68 added, "The book you asked for plus the homemade bookmarks would have been a nice gift. Next year for her birthday make her a macaroni necklace."