Mom mocked every wedding dress her daughter chose, then tried to ruin the day over her boyfriend’s missing invite. Five minutes in, karma arrived
Kathleen hasn't spoken to her mother for the past five years and doesn't regret her decision
The relationship between mothers and children, especially daughters, is expected to be lifelong. However, as kids grow into adults and seek independence, many of these relationships become unhinged. An Oklahoma-based woman named Kathleen (@kath.sierra0) experienced something similar, except her mom pushed things so far that she had no choice but to go no-contact with her. Well, the two always shared a troubled relationship from the beginning. However, things spiraled out of control at Kathleen's wedding after her mother spewed out a gaggle of melodrama that left her forever enraged. On June 25, two weeks after her fifth wedding anniversary, she shared her story on TikTok, garnering over 592,000 views online.
The wedding drama
Kathleen said the day she got married was the last time she spoke to her mom, which was during the COVID-19 pandemic. She said she believes her mom ruined her wedding and that she made the right choice to cut ties with her. Kathleen and her fiancé always wanted a small wedding, and the pandemic made things easy for them. Amidst the wedding hustle, the couple finally arranged a small ceremony with only 20 people, including them. Despite everything going smoothly, her mom complained about everything. First of all, she rejected almost every single dress Kathleen chose for her wedding.
"I love the wedding dress I ended up with, but I just did not get that feeling that people talk about when they find the dress. It could either be because I wasn't in the right headspace or I said yes to that specific dress because she was like, "That's the one," she recalled. Next, Kathleen's mom demanded she bring her new boyfriend to her daughter's wedding. Moreover, she felt offended when asked not to smoke and drink at the wedding. Although Kathleen's mom agreed, her actions later on suggested that her words meant nothing to her.
The last straw
Cut to Kathleen's wedding: while she was sitting around with her girlfriends, mother-in-law, and makeup artist, her mother barged in and asked, “Anyone want to smoke a joint?” However, instead of reacting, the bride brushed it off and focused on enjoying her special day. Later, things got out of control when Kathleen's mom saw her daughter's mother-in-law conversing with her ex-partner, and enraged, she spilled wine all over Elise, Kathleen's sister-in-law. To avoid consequences, her mom acted out a theatrical drama and screamed at her daughter for about five minutes about how she was always treated like a child, until Kathleen’s brother came around and drove her away. Kathleen wasn’t just disheartened; she almost blacked out. That was the first time she set a boundary and the last time she spoke to her mom.
Family estrangement is surprisingly common
Although unfortunate, going no contact with a close one in American households isn't unusual. In fact, according to a YouGov poll, 38% of American adults are estranged from a family member, including 16% who are estranged from a parent. Moreover, 38% of those estranged from their parent said they initiated the no-contact, while 20% said their parent did. Similarly, in a 2015 study published in the Journal of Psychology and Behavioral Science, 9.4% of the participants reported having estrangement from their mothers. While reasons may vary from person to person, a survey of 2,013 mother-child dyads, published in the Journal of Marriage and Family, suggested that value dissimilarity and violation of societal norms are quite common.
'Immature parent behavior'
Meanwhile, reacting to Kathleen's video, @Wrenleysladyb commented, “Adult children don’t typically go no contact without a dang good reason. I wish I had done it much sooner.” @anaquinata echoed the sentiment, “Textbook emotionally immature parent behavior. I’m so sorry you had to go through that and likely countless other instances similar, but like a lot of people on here, I applaud you for doing what you needed to do to find some semblance of peace in your life.”
You can follow Kathleen (@kath.sierra0) on TikTok for relationship and fitness content.
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