Gay man is not invited to family holiday and his niece questions her grandparents about it

Christmas is often a time for family gatherings, but one man was heartbroken when he realized his family had excluded him from their celebrations because he's gay. The 28-year-old shared on Reddit that his parents disowned him eight years ago, and they haven't spoken since. His only connection to his family is through his 34-year-old sister and her 10-year-old daughter, as his sister still maintains a relationship with their parents. After opening up about his experience online, his story quickly gained attention.

"Every year, my parents host a big Christmas gathering. I’m never invited, but my sister and niece always go. A day or two later, we have a smaller Christmas with just the three of us," he explained. After missing yet another family event, his 10-year-old niece began asking questions. "During our smaller gathering, while my sister was in the other room, my niece asked why I never attend the big family Christmas. I gave her the usual excuse: 'I had to work.' But this time, she didn’t buy it. She pointed out that the big gathering often happens on Christmas Day, when she knows I’m off work. She was visibly upset and asked, 'do you not like being with us?'"

It broke his heart that she would say that, and he decided to tell her the truth. "If she hadn’t said that, I probably wouldn’t have told her. But I can’t stand the idea that she would think I chose not to go to the Christmas. So, in a calm voice, I said “Well, you know how I date boys instead of girls? Grandma and Grandpa don’t like that, so they ask me not to go to Christmas.” She was incensed and decided to confront her grandparents about it. "The next day, she called her grandparents and asked how dare they tell me not to come to Christmas. Apparently, she was really harsh with them. Then, my parents called my sister and yelled at her for letting my niece around me," he recalled.

His sister decided to take it out on him. "My sister confronted me and said I was an a$$hole for causing the family fight and for involving my niece in it. I feel really bad, and I really didn’t expect my niece to call them and cause a fight," he wrote before asking other Reddit users if he did the wrong thing by being honest with his niece. Reddit overwhelmingly sided with him and even spared praise for his niece who stood up for him. "If I had a gay sibling and my parents abandoned them, I would totally cut all contact I had with them and watch their hearts break after having lost their gay child, their straight child, and everything else — because of their homophobia," commented one user. "I would disown my parents before I disowned my sister/brother for being gay. Look at what a great uncle you are that your niece told off your parents for their obvious homophobia and horribleness. I’m sorry that your sister couldn’t do for you what your niece did. But, plus side, what a kickass niece," one person wrote.

Some blamed the sister for not backing her brother. "The sister is the worst. She sets an awful example for her daughter who’s clearly got a stronger backbone than her mother," wrote one user. "The sister is also homophobic. Maybe not as much as the parents, but blaming him for not lying to a child, blaming her brother for “causing a fight” by virtue of simply existing, instead of blaming the parents for being homophobic… Glad the little kid called out everyone’s bull cr*p," commented another user. 

This article originally appeared on January 17, 2022