The actress said, 'I think my journey to self – I had to go back to childhood and examine how I was parented.'
Being a stepmom is not an easy task. Besides, no one better than Gabrielle Union could talk about it. The actress shared that she had no idea what she was supposed to do when she first became a stepmom, Union said in an interview with HelloBeautiful for the February 2023 cover. Also, she spoke about the trauma she had faced earlier in life to reach where she is today. When asked about the lessons she has learned on her journey of self-discovery and how it helped her family, she said, "I think my journey to self – I had to go back to childhood and examine how I was parented."
Union has a daughter, Kaavia James, with her husband, Dwyane Wade. He is also a father to sons, Xavier Zechariah, Zaire, and daughter, Zaya. Moreover, a guardian of his nephew, Dahveon Morris. Talking about becoming a stepmom, she said, "They have a mom, she's alive. I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing, but like I'm here with them every day," said Union. She also wondered if she was supposed to be a friend to them. "I had to figure out how to be consistent and nurturing and compassionate and love for each of them. I knew that one size fits all was not gonna work," she added.
When the actress was asked what she and Wade have learned about each other's love languages, Union said, "It’s a process. I would say that our love language started off Spanish and French, and I was like, ‘Yo No Se.’ We just were not on the same page. And now, it’s like we’re both speaking English, but like he’s from Scotland. And I’m like, ‘I don’t even know what you’re talking about.’ It’s a process and we are still learning." "We continue, individually, to unpack our childhoods and how that trauma influences our reactions and our wants and our needs, and how we move through the world. We’re constantly updating our language," she added.
Union never wanted to have children. But after raising three step-children with Wade, she realized that she herself wanted to be a mother. “I never wanted kids, she said in an interview with PEOPLE in 2017. “Then I became a stepmom, and there was no place I’d rather be than with them.” She also shared that it was not easy for her to be in the public eye and deal with infertility. “For so many women, and not just women in the spotlight, people feel very entitled to know, ‘Do you want kids?'” she said. “A lot of people, especially people that have fertility issues, just say ‘no’ because that’s a lot easier than being honest about whatever is actually going on. People mean so well, but they have no idea the harm or frustration it can cause.”
The actress went through three years of failed IVF cycles and was constantly bloated from the hormones. She said that she and her husband “remain bursting with love and ready to do anything to meet the child we’ve both dreamed of.” Union is part of season 3 of Apple TV+'s crime drama, "Truth Be Told." She plays the role of Eva, a high school principal who works towards raising awareness around missing Black girls in her community.