Former couple's unconventional approach to co-parenting their daughter earns admiration from many

Separation or divorce can be hard on a couple but it can be equally hard on their children. To ensure that their child gets the best of both worlds, Te Ara Puketapu (@tearapuketapu_ on TikTok) and her ex have found several unconventional ways to co-parent their daughter. The methods focus on their daughter's happiness and also work well for the former couple's well-being as it causes less conflict between the duo regarding parenting decisions. People on the internet found the methods heartwarming and praiseworthy.

Puketapu shared a list of their unconventional tactics in a TikTok series titled, "Ways we 'co-parent' that makes other people uncomfortable." The first slide read, "We don't have a set schedule. If her dad wants her for more days, more hours, to change days or have random visits—we just do it." She also shared how her daughter calls her dad whenever she feels like it and goes to visit him for a night or a weekend if she misses him. "I also co-parent with both sets of grandparents. Sorry, Dad, Nan and Papa miss her too. We both are missing this weekend," the mom joked.

"Her step-parents are both heavily involved in her care and pick-ups/drop-offs. It isn't awkward," Puketapu revealed. The family also has joint events. They celebrate birthdays together and Christmas is split so their little girl can visit both families. They don't do holiday rotations either and simply make it work somehow. "There's no child support. He sends me whatever I need, whenever I ask for it," the mom added. She revealed that her ex pays weekly for medical bills and health-related costs. The woman also candidly shared that her ex took care of her daughter for an entire month full-time when she was going through a rough patch. "Himself and family returned her and supported me when I was ready," she wrote.

The parents also video call to gossip about their toddler when she is "acting up." The mom doesn't have to run everything about the child past her ex before making decisions. "Day to day decisions, no. Swimming? Just enrolled her and told him later." The only decisions and discussions she has with her ex are health, school and relationship-related. "We focus on our baby and that's it. We don't worry about the other person's life," the woman remarked. "When your main focus is the health and happiness of the kid, it's easier." The post's caption read, "Often we are asked how we co-parent. My answer is our love for our toddler was stronger than our dislike for each other and it overcame everything."

"It wasn't always like this. We just kept trying and kept forgiving each other. Shout out to Dad. I am not the easiest person to co-parent with sometimes," Puketapu added as a PSA. People took to the comments section to admire the duo's co-parenting style.@lus.raii wrote, "I love this. People think, 'Oh, what's the point of divorcing then?' But just because you are good parents and friends doesn't mean you were good as a couple." @serenityhairco1 commented, "I think it's hard for a lot of women because they don't have a baby father like you. I adore this kind of co-parent relationship." @sheloves_jae remarked, "This co-parenting has healed her in ways I wish everyone could."

You can follow Te Ara Puketapu (@tearapuketapu_) on TikTok for more family-related content.