Expert Dave Ramsey says all married couples must merge their finances during call-in, sparks heated debate

Marriages might be made in heaven, but money is a material thing produced right here, on Earth. As far as money is concerned, every individual has their own pace and timing. So when two people get married, naturally the matter of income imbalance crops up. While some people may think that both partners should have an equal share in finances, Dave Ramsey, a personal finance expert–who goes by @daveramsey on TikTok–advises that “money shouldn’t be a ‘me’ thing, it should be a ‘we’ thing.”

Ramsey is a renowned expert, having hosted “The Ramsey Show” and authoring bestsellers like “The Total Money Makeover.” In this video, which has garnered nearly 2 million views, he reflected that marriage is “not [a] partnership” and hence married couples need to budget their money together. “You’re married—you’re not roommates,” he wrote in the caption.

The session included in the video was Ramsey’s response to a woman’s question. She had asked him how should couples suddenly combine their incomes when they get married. “You combine everything, there’s no middle. The preacher didn’t say, now you’re a ‘joint venture.’ He said ‘Now you’re one.’” he told her. The woman questioned, “What if one person makes more than the other?” “You’re not a partnership, you’re a marriage,” Ramsey replied and went on to take the example of his marriage. 

“My wife didn’t have an earned income for 30 years. She stayed home with our children. I do not have an income. ‘We’ have an income. It's as much hers as it is mine – spiritually, morally and legally,” explained the expert. He said that since it’s ‘their’ income and not ‘his,’ he and his wife sit down. “[If] she had an income, it would be put in a pile with mine and I don’t get votes if I make more money. We both have a vote. We both are going to sit down together. We love each other,” he added. While taking the example of a car, he said “it's not titled exclusively to her name or my name. It’s ours. We own everything.”

He advised the woman that by changing the pronouns to “our,” couples can set goals together rather than having independent goals. “Marriages are always growing together or they’re growing apart,” he said. Ending the session on a lighthearted note, the finance expert said, “The only thing that’s not ours is when the dog poops on the floor, that’s my dog. But other than that, we share it,” and burst into laughter.

While Ramsey’s advice was fairly sound, it ended up dividing people, as seen in the comments. People disagreed with his thoughts saying that combining incomes could lead to conflicts and exploitation. “I think you just broke that caller's heart. I guess she makes more than her husband,” said @jeremyberens449. @izzy shared, “Nope. That’s not what we do. We each contribute to a joint fund but also keep our own money. No arguments that way.”

But many resonated with the expert’s tip. For instance, @gq7864 said, “My wife and I both work. Both of our paychecks go into a joint account. We call it ‘family money.’ She buys whatever we need at the stores from that account. I pay the bills from that account. We have no problems.” @steffie added, “It took us three years to combine everything but once we did, it was so much easier.” Ultimately, each marriage is unique and each couple has their own way of managing their finances, as @bbryon also reiterated in a comment, “Nah, you can just do what you like with your own marriage.”

You can follow Dave Ramsey (@daveramsey) on TikTok for more financial advice.