Employee questions why crying at work is considered unprofessional but yelling is accepted

Crying is just an emotion, like being in a state of happiness, showing excitement, or even getting awestruck after seeing something surprisingly shocking. Yet, many view it as something to be considered “unprofessional” due to a perceived lack of control, judgment from peers, and its so-called impact on decision-making. An employee on Reddit, u/ruronistrawberry, called out this notion by speaking up against the bosses who do not shy away from yelling at their juniors and then complaining about the latter shedding tears.

“I am familiar with bosses who yell; it seems they are everywhere, often raising their voices for no apparent reason,” the employee wrote. Following this, the disenchanted junior raised a thought-provoking question. Despite the unwarranted anger, “employees are expected to remain composed and cannot cry when subjected to such behavior,” they stated, pointing out the double standards.

The widely circulated post has a pertinent title: “Why is crying seen as 'unprofessional,' but yelling is not?” The serious question raised by the employee, not only questions the corporate world at large but also brings attention to small and micro-managed workplaces. Additionally, the post managed to garner over 29K upvotes, sparking widespread discussion online.

Several members of the community agreed with the individual's assertion that employees who show their emotions openly are labeled as “unprofessional” when they are doing nothing but being vocal about their low phase. “I believe that yelling is more unprofessional than crying,” the post elaborated. Furthermore, the present work culture critic argued in favor of the vulnerable workers wearing their hearts on their sleeves.

“In my humble opinion, one typically needs to be provoked to cry, whereas there is rarely any justification for yelling,” the employee added. In the comments section, u/RatofDeath remarked, “I worked for many years as an electrician in Switzerland, and being yelled at was very common on many construction sites. To be fair, that was about 15 years ago, and I hope it has improved since then.” To which a resident of the central European country, u/MOTUkraken, replied, “Here in Switzerland, yelling is seen as unprofessional and primitive.”

Sharing their experience, u/DVariant added, “I feel that’s true of construction sites everywhere, certainly in Canada even in 2022.” Another employee, u/RudeYogurt, rebelled against their “rude boss” who yelled at them during a company-wide Zoom call. “I hung up the call, and when we met for 'mediation,' he said, 'This happens in boardrooms and kitchens all across the country' (we worked in IT, so I don’t know where that came from). Yelling is an acceptable way to express your feelings when you're upset!' This man is a PhD psychologist; he knows it was wrong, but pride was more important.”

“Yelling at someone is always inappropriate. However, yelling at someone can sometimes be very helpful,” rebuked u/DupeyTA. “Yes, yelling should be reserved for emergencies when there is imminent danger. Not only is it unnecessary and unhelpful in other situations, but it also ensures that it has a greater impact when it does occur. If you’re constantly being yelled at, you’re just going to tune it out,” u/Ameletus reasoned. A few others also willfully expressed their traumatic experiences after crying at offices, emphasizing the need to make workplaces more inclusive and accepting.