This emergency physician does not rush to inform the relatives of the deceased patients about the heartbreaking news for a thoughtful reason.
When someone passes away, their family and friends aren't the only ones affected by it. Turns out, the doctors and medical staff attending to them in their last hours also find themselves in a pool of heavy emotions. An emergency physician at St. Vincent Emergency Physicians, Louis M. Profeta disclosed how the death of a patient affects him. He also discussed he looks at a dead patient's Facebook page before informing their relatives about their passing.
Profeta, who hails from Indianapolis, appeared on TEDx Talks in 2017 to paint the real picture of an emergency room that is often filled with tragedies. He also penned down a detailed post on his LinkedIn titled "I'll Look at Your Facebook Profile Before I Tell Your Mother You're Dead" which garnered the attention of media and the online community alike. "It kind of keeps me human," Profeta begins the post. "You see, I’m about to change their lives—your mom and dad, that is. In about five minutes, they will never be the same, they will never be happy again. "
"Right now, to be honest, you’re just a nameless dead body that feels like a wet bag of newspapers that we have been pounding on, sticking IV lines and tubes and needles in, trying desperately to save you. There’s no motion, no life, nothing to tell me you once had dreams or aspirations. I owe it to them to learn just a bit about you before I go in," he continues. "Because right now, all I am is mad at you, for what you did to yourself and what you are about to do to them. I know nothing about you. I owe it to your mom to peek inside of your once-living world."
He expresses his disappointment over the circumstances in which emergency patient might have lost their lives. "Maybe you were texting instead of watching the road, or you were drunk when you should have booked an Uber. Perhaps you snorted heroin or Xanax for the first time or a line of coke, tried meth or popped a Vicodin at the campus party and did a couple of shots," Profeta writes. He wonders if the deceased person was riding their bike without a helmet or was mingling with the wrong crowd. Maybe the dead person was not careful enough while crossing a four-way stop or maybe they had simply given up on their lives.
To know more about the patient who had recently passed away, Profeta browses through their Facebook accounts to get a bit more familiar with the patient they had lost. "I see you wearing the same necklace and earrings that now sit in a specimen cup on the counter, the same ball cap or jacket that has been split open with trauma scissors and pulled under the backboard, the lining stained with blood. Looks like you were wearing it to the U2 concert. I heard it was great," the emotional post continues. Profeta observes the photographs of the person who was full of life once, celebrating various events and posing with their beloved pets.
"I see you standing with your mom and dad in front of the sign to your college. Good, I’ll know exactly who they are when I walk into the room. It makes it that much easier for me, one less question I need to ask. You’re kind of lucky that you don’t have to see it. Dad screaming your name over and over, mom pulling her hair out, curled up on the floor with her hand over her head as if she’s trying to protect herself from unseen blows," he concludes in his LinkedIn post. Profeta adds that the real reason he checks their Facebook is because it reminds him that he will be talking about a person who was loved by many people once. It still takes Profeta a lot to calm the voice in his head which keeps questioning how could the patient leave so many people behind who cared about them.