Dating experts analyze and explain how 'orange peel theory' might affect relationships

It takes a lot from two people to keep a relationship succeeding. The people who give their everything into it can make it last. However, recently, people on the internet have been talking about the “orange peel theory” and how it checks the strength of a relationship. Ariel–who goes by @flaw_liss on TikTok–shared that her former boyfriend refused to take the said test, resulting in ending the relationship with him. In the video, she says, “My ex-boyfriend said the main reason he broke up with me is because I brought up the orange peel theory and he thought it was ridiculous. And you know what? I would like someone who wants to peel an orange for me. Really would! Not going to ask you to. I just want to know that you would. Is that too much to ask?”

In this relationship test, one participant asks their partner to peel an orange for them. If the other person agrees, it means they are willing to do small tasks and if they say no, they won’t be much of a help during the relationship. Ariel garnered over 473k views on her video and it is captioned, “Orange peel theory was my ex’s final straw.” @agothbird commented, I brought up orange peel theory and explained how it’s the thing that makes me feel the most loved, so my husband started doing more little tasks for me to make me feel loved.”

@amy07267 wrote, “And I’m over here mourning my mom by doing the dishes, getting dinner ready for tonight, and vacuuming because girlfriend 'doesn’t want to work on her day off.’” @mshell205 expressed, “OMG, I had a migraine today and there was a bowl of oranges on the table. He took one, peeled it and gave it to me for me to eat without me even asking!” @user3034910186825 said, “I think it’s amazing when someone knows what little things make your day. However, I do need to know. As in, I need to be told or see the pattern.”

TikTok has 71 million views for #orangepeeltheory hashtag. Experts say it is not a red flag if one’s partner does not peel an orange. Rachel DeAlro, relationship and communication expert at Match Group and The League, told CNBC, “However, if they consistently fail to do little things that show consideration for you, or they respond negatively to your requests for help, it may indicate larger issues for you to reconsider.” She added that tests like these can do more harm to a relationship. “Relationships are complex and the strength of a partnership is better assessed by looking at deeper factors like ability to communicate, trust, respect, and vulnerability,” she said.

Another expert, Lisa Marie Bobby, who is a relationship psychologist and founder of Growing Self Counseling and Coaching in Denver, said there is some validity to the test. “The way that people do small things tends to be a holographic microcosm of how they did big things,” she said. “I would not make sweeping judgments about how a person peels an orange for you,” she added. “There is possibly some validity, but make sure that it is not the only data point you are evaluating.”