Dad shares how eight days of solo parenting shifted his perspective on his wife's mental load

No amount of parenting guides and handbooks can prepare someone for the challenges of parenthood, especially when tackling it alone. The endless cycle of feeding, cleaning, changing and calming a crying baby can be exhausting. Balancing personal life while caring for an infant is an experience only those who've lived it can fully grasp. A young father named Cedric Thompson Jr.—who goes by @ced on Instagram—had one such eye-opening realization about parenting after solo caring for his children for eight days while his partner was traveling. In a video, he reflected on how the experience shifted his perspective and vowed to approach things differently, resonating deeply with many online.

"Eight days of solo parenting taught me more about mental load than I ever imagined. The endless planning, remembering and organizing is exhausting in ways I never understood before. The most profound lessons come when we walk in someone else's shoes, even if just for a little while," he wrote in the video’s caption. In the video, he holds his baby, fast asleep, while recounting the whirlwind week he experienced after his wife traveled to the Philippines. "I've been a single dad for eight days because my wife is in the Philippines, and I had no idea it was this tough," Thompson Jr. said at the start of the video. He shared that while he was ready for tasks like cleaning, commuting back and forth, handling unexpected illnesses, feeding and managing sleep schedules, he wasn’t prepared for the mental toll. "One thing I was not prepared for was the mental load. I had no idea it felt like this," he admitted.

He went on to describe how constantly thinking about tasks—those yet to be done, those overdue and those requiring planning—felt utterly "draining." He admitted that the experience was so overwhelming that by the end of the day, the mental strain left him with no energy to care for himself. "And now that I understand this, I have so much empathy for my wife, and I truly understand what she means by this mental load and how draining it is," he said. "This has opened my eyes and it's making me ask myself what more can I be doing. What has been going on that I haven't been seeing? And it's been right in front of me. How can I step up the way that my wife needs me to instead of doing things that I think are helping?" he reflected. While acknowledging that he couldn’t always take the mental load away, he concluded the video by expressing his desire to make it lighter. 

The video has amassed over 15 million views, with viewers flooding the comments to share similar experiences and wish the dad all the best. "Society should consider being a housewife with kids as a full-time job," expressed @fashioniconstan. "Ladies, save this post so you can remember what a good guy looks and sounds like. This guy is a winner. Good men do exist," added @ashleyisbrown. "I always would say, 'Just because I make it look easy, doesn't mean it is,'" wrote @thekimhawthorne.

You can follow Cedric Thompson Jr. (@ced) on Instagram for more parenting and lifestyle content.