Some men are all for building big families with multiple kids. However, their enthusiasm only goes as far as having the children and not the actual life-long responsibility of raising them well.
There are umpteen instances where moms feel nostalgic about their babies growing up and are ever-ready to take on the roller coaster of a journey for another baby. There are dads too who can't wait to have more babies simply to grow the tribe, leaving the onus of caring for them almost entirely on moms after the child is born. Sure, wanting more babies makes them "fun dads." However, how much of a father's role are they playing? TikTok dad Bradley Dean revealed that "fun dads" aren't as responsible as you think. In his recent video, he interestingly used sarcasm to point out how you can identify the dad who is a stranger to the often overwhelming experiences parents face.
He began his video by saying, “Lately I’ve noticed a direct correlation between how glowing and rosy some men are about parenting and how involved they are in the actual parenting.” He then cited a sarcastic example that you might've heard around some men. Dean said, “If they are like, ‘I can’t wait to have three, four, five kids’ then they probably don’t do sh*t.” Hinting towards the humongous responsibility and the crazy amount of strength it takes to parent a baby, Dean mentioned that you could know a dad does nothing if he's enthusiastic about having more kids.
He then added, “If they’re like, ‘I can’t wait for a stranger to hack through my vas deferens,’ then they’re probably getting stuff done.” Dean highlighted with humor how dads who truly are involved understand the preparation required and would be more cautious about having more kids. His video went viral with fellow dads getting their game on and sharing their experiences. @hcox23 said, “My toddler forced himself into the bathroom while my husband was there. All I heard was, ‘I don’t think I want another one of these.’” @azd711 said, “Anyone who spends time with a bunch of kids knows that you don’t want that many of them together.”
There is an ongoing debate about the role of a father in a child’s life. With mothers having to constantly be the primary parent in the initial years of a child's life, many dads choose to take a backseat rather than be a support system or at the least, an empathetic partner. In a recent article, it was shared that Palm Beach County school district in Florida declared a "Dads take your child to school" day. The event is dedicated to ensuring that dads understand that they too need to be actively participating in their child’s life and education. This initiative in particular assists schools with "building capacity in fatherhood engagement."
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Their website mentioned: “Findings suggest that when fathers are actively involved in their child’s education, students perform better academically, have fewer discipline problems, and become more responsible adults.” The article even suggested alternatives for dads to spend more time with their children at home. These included a few minutes at bedtime talking with children about each other’s day and starting a journal project in which children write to their dad and their dad writes back. They also suggest that dads involve the children in creating a weekend plan that they can do together. Parenting is a joint task and dads coming together will do more than just aiding the moms. It will help them create wholesome experiences and establish a better bond with their kids.
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