Couple play Rock Paper Scissors to solve wedding dispute — loser takes winner's surname

In a video shared by groom @james.dcruiser on Instagram, a newlywed couple found a lighthearted but decisive way to settle a traditionally weighty topic: whose last name to take after the wedding. Rather than discuss or debate it, they chose to settle it publicly with a game of rock-paper-scissors, played just moments after their ceremony. The caption read, "Ro Sham Bo. HIGH STAKES! Winner takes loser’s surname."

Surrounded by family and friends, the couple began the match, playing for the best-of-three. Guests watched with anticipation as the first round went to the groom. The bride claimed the second, evening the score, and adding to the suspense. Laughter and cheers filled the background as the third and final throw determined the outcome. The bride won, prompting a joyful celebration from her side and a humorous but surrendering reaction from the groom. The video ended with a cheer and the final surname, "Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Hunter."

The moment stood out not just for its creativity but also for how easily it subverted a long-standing custom, with both individuals visibly comfortable and confident in letting chance determine the outcome. Viewers on Instagram responded with overwhelming support and shared their own approaches to navigating name changes in marriage. @kim.wins86 commented, "Love this! Let's normalize this kind of secure masculinity! Solid green flag!" @adancingwulf wrote, "Love this!! My fiancé & I are combining our last names. Moreno + Kind = Morekind. We’re both very happy with it, even though it’s non-traditional."

@schreckee shared, "When your last name is Schreck and your husband agrees with you that your last name is cooler than his." @shelleeward added, "I love this. My husband and I combined our last names (not hyphenated) to come up with a brand new name. I love it so much." @healthyliving.with.the.hunters wrote, "I became a Hunter through marriage also. Sure makes it easy. No one ever asks how to spell my name anymore." @destineepanic commented, "Both very cool names lol. I love him for being a true man and loving his wife enough to take her name and not cry about it."

While the vast majority of comments celebrated their approach, some men voiced criticism. Those dissenting voices often reflected traditional expectations linked to patriarchy and masculinity, suggesting that a man taking a wife’s surname challenges deep-rooted gender norms. Academic research supports this tension. A 2024 study in Sexuality & Culture found that individuals with sexist attitudes, both hostile and benevolent, were more likely to judge men (and women) negatively when they made nontraditional surname choices, reflecting that surname change remains a deeply gendered issue.

That tension, however, hasn’t stopped couples from finding creative, inclusive ways to make the surname decision their own. In another story from England, a queer couple, Jasmine Moodie and Elle Upshall, faced a similar dilemma where neither wanted to drop their family name, and both versions of the combined surname felt equally meaningful. Rather than settle it privately, they invited their 60 wedding guests to vote. The guests were asked to choose between Moodie-Upshall and Upshall-Moodie on the RSVP form. To keep the final result a surprise, their officiant collected the ballots and withheld the outcome until the ceremony itself. The winning name was Upshall-Moodie, with a final vote of 29 to 24 — a result they later joked was "closer than Brexit."

You can follow James D’Cruiser (@james.dcruiser) on Instagram for more vlog-style content.