It is important to ensure that kids grow up in a nurturing environment that pushes them to become their best selves.
The way parents interact with their kids and treat them when they are little impacts a lot of their behavior as adults. When kids grow up in a kind, empowering and nurturing environment, they turn into beautiful, empathetic and confident adults. Jessica VenderWier, who is a registered psychotherapist recently posted a carousel on Instagram from her account @nurturedfirst wherein she talks about the one thing her parents would do that helped her increase her confidence.
As per her profile on Raising Families Therapy, VenderWier is a passionate psychotherapist who has extensive experience working with children's mental health, play therapy, and complex behaviors amongst other things. She provides support in the areas of perinatal mental health, families and children, and parenting support. The first frame of her post on Instagram reads: "One simple thing my parents did that boosted my confidence." The one thing that her parents would do was they would talk to her stuffed animals about her.
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The next few frames spoke about what the parents would tell VenderWier's stuffed animals. They would say things like "Wow, did you see her? She got dressed quickly. She looks so confident in that outfit!" or "Oh, Bunny, you're so silly. You think you love her the most. But I love her even more!" Her parents would also ask her Teddy bear to take care of her and give her lots of snuggles. She says that as a kid, she would often sit and overhear her parents and say nice things about her which helped her confidence. Not just that, as a grown-up therapist, she came to realize the importance and true value of this trick her parents used.
When she tried the same with her daughter Coco, she could see her daughter's face light up and her body posture changes as the little girl overheard VenderWier say nice things about her. Even in the caption of this post, the psychotherapist reiterates just how much of a good practice this is. She says, "Letting kids overhear good things about them is a simple yet profound concept." She also adds that this also applies to adults. Giving a for instance, she explains: "For example, your partner says, 'Vera, I appreciate you; you work so hard.'" While this in itself will make you feel great, what if you also hear them compliment you in front of their mother and tell her that they think you work hard?
She concludes by saying that while it is wonderful to say nice things to someone to their face, there is something quite powerful about hearing someone praise you in front of someone else and that parents should do this because it'll surely make up their kid's day and life better. @your_coach_jennifer said, "This almost makes me emotional - how important. I love this. They’re amazing - our kids should overhear us bragging about them. And like this? What a great way to introduce a gratitude or affirmation practice!"
@jernelley spoke about how this trick worked very well for their kid. They said, "Thank you for sharing this tip and trick. I gave it a try this morning and it works like magic! It has been challenging for me to get my child to get up early and prepare to go to school in the morning. This has lasted for more than a year. After reading this post last night I decided to give it a try to tell her favorite soft toy that she is very independent that she will clean up herself and fast in getting herself ready. I can see the change in my child's mood and very motivated to get herself ready. The bonus from this is that, I hear more “I love you” from my child. I’m wowed by this and grateful for this tip and trick. Hope this works for other parents too."