Bridesmaids spent $1,000 each on dresses, a 74-person shower and a multi-day bachelorette — only for the couple to announce they’d eloped a year ago
The bridesmaids were instructed to buy a '$250+ purple chiffon dress (and some up to $250 more for alterations)' and that was just the beginning
Weddings are supposed to celebrate love and lifelong bonds. For one Midwestern bridesmaid, however, the entire experience turned into an absolute nightmare. It all started when a 30-year-old bride hijacked a friend's paid graduation photo shoot just to propose to her bridal party, and things only went downhill. The bridesmaids were forced to buy purple gowns worth $500 with alterations and had to pay over $500 to host a massive 74-guest shower, followed by hundreds more during the bachelorette. But perhaps what shocked everyone the most was the revelation during the vows. One of the bridesmaids (u/DrFunke74) shared the incident on Reddit on September 26, 2026, garnering over 2,100 upvotes.
Hijacking the photoshoot and dress code
Trouble began when one of the bridesmaids hired a professional photographer to celebrate her college graduation with her family, and the bride ambushed the session without warning. "I think the bride thought it would be a good time since we were all together," the bridesmaid noted. She explained how more than half of her friends' paid family portraits were abruptly turned into an impromptu bridesmaid proposal. But this was just the beginning. The bridesmaids was instructed to buy a "$250+ purple chiffon dress (and some up to $250 more for alterations)."
The unwanted financial burdens
Moreover, because neither side of the family offered to help, the bridal party was also forced to organize the pre-wedding shower themselves. The bride promptly handed them an absurdly long guest list. "BRIDE INVITED 74 WOMEN! Almost every woman on the guest list was invited!" the bridesmaid exclaimed. This led the bridesmaids to scramble for a bigger venue and also dish out roughly $500 each on what felt like a blatant gift grab. In the end, a competing family party meant only a handful of guests showed up. Nonetheless, the financial demands kept piling up with a multi-day bachelorette trip. Each bridesmaid had to shell out another $300 to fund the getaway, while the bride contributed nothing.
Bride's 'total meltdown'
Having spent a fortune before the wedding festivities even began, the bridesmaids at least expected a decent ceremony. But they were let down and disappointed yet again after being ordered to stay together in a three-room rental. Plus, 12 people were forced to share just two bathrooms. Meanwhile, several were kicked out just because they refused to attend. The bride and groom provided zero refreshments for their guests, and when a groomsman announced late-night concert plans, "the bride had a total meltdown." "[She] locked herself in a room for an hour or so, meaning we were very late to the rehearsal dinner," the bridesmaid revealed.
The big day unravels
The day of the wedding arrived with little relief for the bridesmaids, who woke up to a pan of cold leftovers while the men went out to eat. The venue offered only minimal lunch subs, leaving everyone starving until evening. Family drama erupted as the bride argued with her sisters, and over a third of the table sat completely empty. "The bride was furious about people not sitting in their assigned seats but only gave assignments for the first three tables," the bridesmaid said.
The most stunning twist, however, came during the vows when the couple revealed to their guests that they actually eloped more than a year ago. This left the guests, especially the bridesmaids, furious, as they all wanted to leave, realizing they had been fooled by the couple.
The pressure to spend more
As it turns out, these bridesmaids aren't alone who think they spent more than they should've or wanted to. According to a LendingTree survey, 62% of bridal party members feel that the wedding expenses are totally out of control in today's world. Meanwhile, a staggering 39% of bridesmaids reported feeling pressured to spend more than they should on pre-wedding activities, similar to these women. Additionally, 22% of women felt that they spent more than they should on the wedding. This clearly shows that this is a growing problem within the country.
Don't want to be a bridesmaid
As a result of these expenses and stories, women no longer want to be part of the bridal party. u/ER_Support_Plant17 commented, "I would not be a bridesmaid for someone who crashed a photographer I had paid for photos with my family." u/otepp pointed out, "I will never understand the whole “surprise we eloped a year ago” gag. It is wildly disrespectful to the guests who spent time and money to come be a part of a wedding. I don’t even understand what kind of reaction they’re hoping for. It’s like selling tickets to a concert but playing it a year early, then telling the people who showed up that they missed the show and will not be getting a refund, but they can watch a YouTube video of the concert."
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