Bride's dad passed away 10 years ago — so she did a 'first look' with the men who stepped in for him

A video posted by Gracie Calkins (@gracie.r.calkins) captured a deeply personal moment on her wedding day. The video was recorded during what would have traditionally been a father-daughter first look, but this time, it was shared with the six men who stood in for her father. It included her dad's friends, godfather, and father-in-law among others. The post has since received over 47,000 views and more than 4,185 likes. The story of how so many of her dad's friends stepped up for her through her life in his absence and it resonated with the internet.

Calkins shared that she lost her father ten years ago. Since then, others in her life have helped carry that absence. As she prepared for her wedding, she decided to honor each of them with a moment that acknowledged the space they had filled and the roles they had stepped into. One by one, she greeted them, men who had shown up over the years as father figures, friends, protectors, and constants. Among them were her godfather, her father-in-law, her stepdad, her brother, and her dad’s closest friends. The text on screen added, "I’ll never take for granted how lucky I am to have these six standing in for the most special one in Heaven."

In a note accompanying the video, she wrote, "Happy Father’s Day, Pops — they got you covered down here." The clip ends with a framed photo of a young Gracie walking with her father, paired with the message, "Miss you always, Papa." Gracie’s video captures the emotional importance of having father figures step in when a biological father is no longer present. A 2013 review published in Demography examined over 40 studies using rigorous methods and found consistent evidence that children who grow up without their biological fathers face a greater risk of challenges across key areas of life.

These include lower rates of high school graduation, greater difficulty with emotional regulation, and a higher likelihood of experiencing mental health struggles in adulthood. The study noted that while the effects can vary depending on when the loss occurs and other family conditions, the absence itself leaves a measurable mark, particularly on social-emotional well-being. The video touched many who saw it, and viewers responded with messages of love and support. @reneereaux said, "The absolute best stand-ins. Dad sure knows how to pick them." @camcourville wrote, "Gracie, I know being your godfather (and one of your stand-ins) is one of his favorite things." @omglennie commented, "Oh Gracie, this makes me weepy. What beauty you have found and worked for in your life! Your daddy is so proud of you."

Just like Calkins chose to surprise the men who had quietly stood in for her late father with a moment of gratitude, another bride found herself on the receiving end of an unexpected gesture, one she never saw coming. Jess Anastasi (@mrsanastasi_ on TikTok) was looking forward to a father-daughter dance on her wedding day, but her father refused to participate. Heartbroken and unprepared for the moment, she was caught off guard when her father-in-law stepped forward, took her hand, and led her through the dance without hesitation. Anastasi later shared that she no longer speaks to her side of the family, but that her husband's family has embraced her completely. "I'm so lucky to have my father-in-law. He makes me feel more loved than my own dad."

You can follow Gracie Calkins (@gracie.r.calkins) on Instagram for more daily life content.