Boyfriend told his pregnant girlfriend, 'Why do you need a doula? You'll have me' — then disappeared when she needed him most during labor
A baby's father disappears moments into the delivery room - despite a longheld promise
When most women prepare to bring new life into the world, they expect their partners to support them throughout their pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum. But when a man brushed off his pregnant girlfriend’s (u/creepy_line3977) request for extra support with a confident, "Why do you need a doula? You'll have me," it ended up disappointing her to the core. He not only left her alone at the hospital before she went into labor but also missed the birth of their baby. Later, the boyfriend tried to justify his carelessness with a weird excuse. The story shared on September 30, 2026, has received 10,000 upvotes on Reddit.
Dad-to-be disappears
The couple had been together for about a year and a half when they found out they were expecting. Excited and nervous about the new journey, they started discussing birth plans together and consulting a doula. Everything seemed on track until the author was diagnosed with preeclampsia, requiring an unexpected early induction. She immediately informed her boyfriend and assumed he would meet her in the waiting room. But when she called him, she realized he was nowhere near the hospital. Because doulas typically arrive once active labor begins, the pregnant mom was left alone with hospital staff for hours during one of the most agonizing stretches of her pregnancy. Once active labor kicked in, the doula arrived, immediately called the missing boyfriend, and "ripped him a new one" until he finally showed up. But he walked out again just an hour before their baby was delivered.
The bailout excuse
Later, the man defended his absence with a strange reason. He explained his sudden disappearance wasn't a matter of neglectful indifference, but rather a severe phobia of blood and hospitals that he'd never mentioned before. Instead of being transparent so they could prepare alternative birth strategies, he chose induction day to execute his personal plan: "His strategy was to bail." While acknowledging that a phobia isn't entirely a choice, the mother highlighted his lack of effort to address it, asking, "Go to therapy, dude?"
Labor room panic
A (February 2020) YouGov survey found that 79% of surveyed adults feel men should be in the labor room, supporting their partner through childbirth, while only 5% felt it's not necessary. This means abandoning a partner during labor over a hidden fear highlights a severe breakdown in communication. However, as the author's boyfriend mentioned, many expecting fathers do experience debilitating fear of childbirth. In fact, a study (by Emma Moran) cited that nearly 13% of expectant fathers experience an overwhelming fear of childbirth. Managing that journey becomes exponentially harder when phobias such as the author's boyfriend's are kept secret.
'He should be ashamed'
Meanwhile, the comment section erupted in overwhelming support for the new mother while criticizing the boyfriend's lack of communication and accountability. Many readers pointed out that while having a phobia is understandable, hiding it and leaving a partner unsupported during childbirth is completely inexcusable. u/Fionaelaine4 commented, "He didn’t give OP the chance to find someone to support her when he knew he wasn’t. That’s inexcusable". Similarly, u/sleepyplatipus wrote, "I’m sure most women have a fear of being ripped from hole to hole, and yet… what a coward."
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