The 21-year-old pop star opened up about how she had to break through her own 'internalized misogyny.'
Billie Eilish is getting candid about her journey through womanhood. The 21-year-old popstar has been in the business ever since she was a young teenager and she has admitted that she struggled with identifying as a woman. But now she is proud and grateful to be who she is. In an emotional speech at Variety's Power of Women event, Eilish was honored for her work with Support + Feed, a plant-based food initiative founded by her mom, Maggie Baird.
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Presenting Eilish with the honor, "Barbie" star Ariana Greenblatt explained that she'd admired the musician from afar until they met at the film's premiere. Eilish’s Grammy-nominated ballad “What Was I Made For?” was the film's soundtrack. The artists connected, she said, over being young women in the film and music business.
"Growing up in this industry at such a young age, I'm constantly trying to fit in with my adult peers, and I still can't really relate to anyone my age," she said, tearing up according to TODAY. "Billie is the one person I see myself in and relate to in many ways." Greenblatt continued to praise the "Bad Guy" singer as a role model to young women. "Billie’s authenticity and fearlessness to express herself through her art spoke to me in ways no one else had,” she said.
Eilish too broke down as she accepted the tribute and joked about being on medication for laryngitis. “Oh man I was crying over there girl. Guys I’m on Prednisone, you ever taken that, no for real. I’ve had no voice, Margot [Robbie], all week... Last time I was on it I threw my phone and shattered a mirror. And this time I be crying,” she shared according to Variety. The hitmaker then collected herself and got extremely honest.
“I don’t like doing speeches because I would rather give my platform to people who know what the f--- they’re talking about,” she said “I was so young—I’m still young—but coming up and being 15, it’s really f---ing me up a little bit to think about. I don’t be crying, like I’m not a crying person. Like, I’m zooted right now, sorry.”
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The musician first entered the industry in 2015 with her debut single "Ocean Eyes," written and produced with her brother, Finneas. She opened up about her journey of figuring out her identity and her experiences in the spotlight. She said she struggled "not feeling like I fit in to being a woman" and became insecure about it.
“I think for a couple years because of that insecurity, I became almost very ‘pick me’ about it, and I would be like, ‘Oh, I’m not like other girls because I don’t do this and this,” the Oscar-winning songwriter confessed. “I’ve grown to be very resentful of that period of time because I’m so much more interested in being like other girls because other girls are f---ing tight, and I love women.”
The singer admitted that she still has some things she struggles with. "This sounds kind of f---ed up but I have a lot of internalized misogyny inside of me and I find it coming out in places I don’t want it to. And I have to say, with full transparency, I feel very grateful to be a woman right now. I feel very proud, and I feel very honored to be here.”
In an interview with Variety, she clarified that her preferred pronouns are still "‘she/her’ and things like that, but I’ve never really felt like a girl.” Now she is embracing who she is and can't be prouder of being a woman and of all the other amazing women in her life.