Aunt stands up for herself by refusing to let her niece and nephew call her by offensive nickname.
Few things cut deeper than being mocked for your identity, especially when the ridicule comes from those who are supposed to love you most—your family. For Reddit user u/Forward-Plant-1056, this painful reality has been part of her life for as long as she can remember. The 19-year-old shared her story online, recounting the hurtful treatment she has endured because of her skin tone and racial background.
In her post, she explained the root of her differences: her mother is Indigenous and Black, while her father has Italian and German ancestry. As a result, she physically resembles her mother, with a skin tone much darker than her paternal relatives. This difference became a target for cruel jokes, including a nickname that translates to "Little Coal." The name stuck, and with it came a lifetime of painful memories.
Her story highlights the insidiousness of racism, especially when it’s perpetuated within families. The ridicule not only alienated her from her relatives but also left deep emotional scars. Her experience sheds light on how harmful words, even when disguised as “jokes,” can shape someone’s sense of self-worth.
Though hurt by the nickname, she continues to have a relationship with the cousins. One day, she took her niece and nephew, 8 and 6, respectively, to an ice cream date. To her shock, they also began calling her the same nickname. "I asked them to please not call me that because it made me very sad," she wrote. "But they continued calling me it." She gave them repeated warnings, but they would not give in. Not willing to get insulted anymore, she contacted her cousin "to notify her that something had come up and I couldn't take the kids to ice cream anymore." The kids did not think their aunt was serious, but when she left them at their house, they understood this was no joke. Understanding they had hurt their aunt, they profusely apologized, but the aunt refused to listen.
The cousin got in touch with her and was surprised by her behavior. She called the woman "immature" and criticized her for making the kids cry due to a stupid nickname. The cousin added that this was not a healthy way to handle this situation because "kids this age don't understand consequence, so me canceling was just an a**hole move since they wouldn't understand it was because they were calling me the nickname." The woman felt overwhelmed by all this blame just because she wanted to remove herself from a hurtful scenario. Therefore, she came on Reddit for a third-party view.
The comment section was on the woman's side and supported her for putting herself first. u/Venusbellarosa wrote that the kids needed to have this lesson, "Nta they are 6 and 8 they are old enough to understand. Also wonder if your family calls you that behind your back. For the kids to be parroting that around." u/mc87 pointed out how offensive the nickname is and commented, "NTA, that seems pretty racist actually. It's wild that your cousin would teach her kids that name. She probably doesn't want to own up to the fact that she and everyone else who calls you this has been a racist AH this whole time. Shocker. They're also 6 and 8, so they can understand not to do something after an adult asks."
This article originally appeared 9 months ago.