25-year-old given year to live gets outpouring of support as she prepares to tell parents

Breaking life-altering news to loved ones is never easy, and for one 25-year-old woman, the stakes couldn't have been higher. After receiving a devastating diagnosis of incurable bowel cancer with just over a year left to live, she faced the daunting task of telling her parents—whom she describes as emotionally close but geographically distant. Turning to the internet for advice, the Reddit user u/ThrowRA54321123 shared her story and sought guidance on how to approach such an unimaginable conversation.

"My parents and I are really close emotionally, but not geographically. They live abroad, so I only see them a couple of times a year, though we speak nearly every day," she wrote. The woman explained how she began experiencing unusual symptoms months earlier, leading to a series of tests, scans, and eventually a biopsy. Wanting to spare her parents unnecessary worry before knowing the full extent, she initially kept the situation between herself and her partner.

"Many tests later, including some very uncomfortable scans, it turns out I have incurable bowel cancer and a year or so at most. Which sucks," she shared candidly. The woman’s openness struck a chord online, with commenters offering heartfelt advice on how to handle the delicate situation with compassion, honesty, and care.

"No one knows yet except my partner, but I need and want to tell my parents so that it's not a complete shock to them when I see them in a few months," she added. "I'm due to visit in November and I really need that visit to be as happy as it can be and also because I need them." The concerned woman asked, "How do I approach this conversation? It doesn't feel like something I can just drop into a phone call, but the thought of flying out to them to tell them in person is pretty daunting. Also, for my partner's sake, I want to tell them soon because aside from me, he's the only one who knows and this is really hard on him." The couple hasn't told anyone else about the woman's diagnosis yet out of fear that a well-meaning relative might post something on social media, revealing the information to her parents before she has a chance to tell them herself.

The woman mentioned that her partner needed someone other than her to talk to about the diagnosis and asked for help. People took to the comments section to share helpful advice with the woman. u/Accurate_Barnacle895 wrote, "If I were to receive this news from my daughter, I would actually prefer it be on a phone call. This would allow me to process the news without the need or desire to protect her from my pain. I wouldn’t have to worry about adding to her pain because of my facial expression or tears, etc. I would only have to focus on my words. And I would want to know as soon as possible without delay when time is short, everyday matters. There is no way to make this easy or less painful for them or for you. Just focus on getting it out there. If you aren’t up to it, consider having your spouse speak with them if that would help you. I am so sorry for what you are going through."

u/NYCStoryteller commented, "I'm sorry for what you're going through. It's not fair. Just pick up the phone and call them. I know it's a lot for a phone call, but you really don't know how you're going to be feeling in November. You need them. Odds are, they will be on the next flight to you and have a million questions." u/Artistic_Chapter_355 remarked, "Hugs to you. I heard a therapist say that the best way to have a difficult conversation is to have it. There’s rarely a trick that will make it easier beyond diving in. You could try to write a short script for yourself, just a sentence or two, to help you get the words out."